ANOTHER AAAAAAAH

ok... yes im relaxed but i need to VENT... list is still way above the limit... all im getting is ppl saying " NO ONE WILL MISS YOUR WEDDING".... ( that was supposed toe ba comforting thought ? : lol what happened to "invite 200 ppl and 100 will show up" lol im kidding if i invited u i wish you can make it... bindabirlkum ma7al ba3teekum my chair kaman... ill keep the 3arees :P

anyway... i would love that everyone i know be there including the bloggers but walllahi its small so if ur not invited its just because its not even a wedding its a small dinner...

anyway... soo i went to the visa consulate today... after getting lost for an hour ofcourse.... jsut to find out that thialand is celebrating some thialand holiday and decide to take 2 days off! the 2 days i had planned on applying for the visa.. so another PLAN of the day RUINED! AAAAAAAH

then i get a call.. from a weird number.. and usually that is not good...

ALo...
ALoo

miss X:Dina?
MOI :AAH
Miss X:Inti madam wala 2anseh
*dino thinking to herself...this is a wrong time for anti's with 3irsan offers
Dina :MAdam... khier?
aah ana baddee 2ilieek ino il ra7 ta3malik sha3ratik fil 3urs saafarit 3omra and ana ra7 2a3milik iyaham...

me HUH? safarat? meen? wayn? who are you?

so the lady who i had booked to do my hair for the non hijabi pics decided to go for 3omra.. now i have this other person who i have no idea about...

anyway... what the worst that can happen? she could easily decide to TRIM my hair and make tisreee7aaaaaaaaaa "ra2i3a" with meeeeesh and weird 7ashwat in the hair... making me look like im part of " cirque de soleil"

i hate it when salon ladies think they know what you want and end up ruining your hair!! or when you say bidi LIGHT MAKE UP.. like INVISIBLE makeup.. the make up that you have to wonder if its REALLY THERE.. she says.. "eh eh ma inti 3arooooooooooooooos lazim makeup 3ashan iltasweer "and before u know it your face looks like a VAN GOGH painting 3alas shwayait zahrat al khaleeej style!!!

yes u said it TASWEER not being spotted through a SATELLITE from outer space! ya3ni all my life i have taken pics... and they look fine ( expect for a few where i have werid facial expressions" but how come yowm il 3urs your makeup has to be INTENSE as in layers and layers.. :P have u girlies out there noticed how when a salon find out u are a bride they charge u extra!! like ok.. how much is hair styling... 200 ok yes ok so will u adjust the tar7a for me.. : oohh Tar7a lala il tisree7a ta3it il 3aroos is 1500!! if not 3000!! HELLO its the same freakin tisree7a?!?!!

ARGH.... 7arameyeen il nass sayreen!!

anyway...i will not let some lady turn my face into merlin manson..i will do do everything my way.... and btw when it comes to makeup LESS IS MORE PEOPLE LOL

ANyway.. then i get a call from my cousin who is coming from amman today... and well.. guess what SHE MISSED HER FLIGHT.. and now she is taking a later flight... which somehow stresses me out more..

sho kaman???? I NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED VALIUM.. thanks for your comment forgive me for not replying im just like my cousin said " ur probably running around like a headless chicken" lol

Soo true... :P

today is over so i have 2moro and after wa BASS!! hope there are no last minutre mishaps or surprises.. i hope i dont trip.. since we ARE going up STAIRS.. i hope i dont spill juice on ahmed.. i hope i dont step on the litte girl who will be throwing flowers inforont of me.. i hope i dont step on ahmeds feet when we dance! i hope that my wedding will be perfect... as soon as i have time ill post all the wedding stuff i did!! :) i had the cartoon on the wedding invitation :)

thanks for all ur support guys

Allah yis3idkum

2 DAYS LEFT!!!

let me start by saying....

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

now let me just quickly type this before i run out of the house being the bridezilla that i am!!

wedding was supposed to be 100 to 110 people max.... when i went through the list of invited people ( who probably WILL come) 140 PEOPLE!!!! some MINI-Miscalculation!!

or lets say MAJOR miscalculation!

dina : mama how many ppl are your list
mama : ma bitla3ooosh 20 30 maximnum
dina: mama akeed? akeed? 3ashan ba3zim naas kman
mama: aaah aaah

*dina invites more people ( including some who didn't invite her to their own wedding which she regrets very deeply now) lol

later on that day... counting list.... AAAAAAAAH 140.. 30 ppl must stick to the dance floor.. wait.. there is not much dance floor... there is not DANCING lol
ok i guess 30 ppl must just come sit by me and ahmed

anyway... ofcourse im getting not only lovely spots on my FACE but i feel sick and have a major COLD today!! 2 DAYS usually pass by quickly in the normal days you can imagine how FAST they will pass by when u are GETTING MARRIED

IM GETTING MARRIED!! ME ? DINA? pls keep telling me because the thought is not sinking in ... its soo weird... not bad weird.. not twilight zone weird.. just weird..

i wonder what embarrassing things i will do when the cameras are pointed at me for 3 hours.. all my experiences with video cameras and being taped include major embarrassment ! because i tend to do many faces when i talk .. like very expressive faces... that i dont even realize im doing... and when im nervous i SMILE.. like that major signal 2 smile... ok smiling is good but overdoing the smile is just :S GOOFY!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH GOTTA RUN VISA TIME

ID3ooooooooooooooooooooolna

The Countdown HAS BEGUN

So... on a less depressing note... i'm getting married ( INSHALA ) :)

irdaa al nasss ghaya la tudrak... so whatever i do... or don't do... i will always here criticism complaints and negative comments... been driving myself mad trying to think of how to make everyone happy... including myself.. and well.. that is not exactly possible...

yes dad is still recovering and his recovery will take months.. even years... some suggested i wait for a couple of years before i get married.. others said i should not even wear a white dress... people said all sorts of things.. and what i have to say is that.. AL hamdulilah baba is ALIVE... he will be better with time inshala...

it's been around 5 months now and having a small wedding dinner does not mean i'm selfish.. it does not mean i don't care about my dad's current situation.. it just means life goes on and i know if was able to speak he would be the first to tell me to go on with this...

i am sad because i will not have the dream of him walking me down the aisle... but la i3tirad 3aala qada2 Allah... wa i still want what every girl lives her whole life dreaming of... a BEAUTIFUL WEDDING DAY...


INshala all goes well.. 6 DAYS left....

the thought that im going to a wedding where im THE BRIDE is just not sinking in :S

cow is also stressed with me! Allah ytamem 3ala khier

i miss you

dear baba..

i miss you... your loud voice... your loud cough when you enter the house.. your friday breakfasts & grocery shopping "outing"...the many awkard silences we had... i miss the way you used to express your love by making us never need anything... you had a bad temper and sometimes yelled for no reason.. but behind that roar was a soft heart...

you were my shield...my security... you protected us from the cruelty of the world and to me although we didn't bond much i knew i could count on you.. i knew you would be there... i knew you would take care of us... what i didn't know is that i took your presence in my life for granted.. i wouldn't make any effort to get closer to you... i didn't express what i felt because throughout the years it became even harder for me to express my feelings to you... you confused strength & pride with expressing your feelings.. to you expressing love was a weakness... which is why there was this unbreakable barrier between us... to save myself from feeling rejected by you i also pushed you away and created my own barrier without even noticing...

i never knew tears could flow down your cheeks without you even realizing they are... i never knew pain could be so intense that it feels like it has become a part of you... i never thought i would feel this much regret in my life.. i never imagined this could happen to you...

i can't believe this is your reality... i can't bare to see you like this... i'm so sorry if i wasn't the best daughter.. if i didn't appreciate you... im so sorry i am selfish sometimes... i'm sorry i can't say anything to you when i see you...

i just miss you & hate my life without you...

Cow Appreciation Day!!

Today is not any day... it is... COW APPRECIATION DAY.. so people... if you come across a cow... give it some lovin'

:) a hug... a massage... a facial... just be good to all cows today :) Eat your burgers 2moro :)

BLOCK BLOCK BLOCK

you know recently i have realized that i have this strange ability to block things... i think its a blessing.. like i have a built in firewall that only accepts certain thoughts and blocks others...

this firewall works almost all the time... but there are moments.. it suddenly shuts down and i'm overwhelmed with those thoughts i had blocked and i feel like i am going to burst into tears.. and sometimes i do.. and people around me would look at me weird and think .. wasn't she fine just a second ago... well.. just cause i don't express what i feel doesn't mean i don't feel it..

my bagara has been a great help and keeps dancing in her new leopard outfit singing lurpak songs...

anyway... i don't think i'll ever get over how my dad is now... and i'll never understand what happened to him... i can't imagine that he might not ever be the same.. i can't imagine how he feels... it hurts so much that blocking this reality is what keeps me okay..

some things don't get easier by time.. the only thing that gets easier is blocking...


ok... too much nakad for one day...

after all this time just when we thought baba was getting better and moved out of the ICU.. he went back in last night... they might get him out today.. inshala khier... its so hard to deal with things especially when you have high hopes... then suddenly you are back to square one..

Allah Ysabirna wa yishfee :(

PIANIST NEEDED

hello readers... i am looking for someone who is good piano player that will play the piano for 2 hours in my wedding dinner (not for free ofcourse )... if you know anyone or are a pianist and ofcourse are interested leave me a comment and i will be so grateful...

:) i had to give it a shot.. you never know who reads your blog :)

next cartoon is coming soon im going through wedding stress again... less than a month left... so much to do...

*SCREAM

Cow'$ Update$

i know most of you are fans of my cow.. and well i havent updated you on her life for a while.. she was fired from her last job because her inability to read or write was a major requirement :S so now she has started her new job as a house maid! :S

she mentioned that the couple that live there usually argue about the same thing...the fact that they are so different.. when i say different i'm not saying as individuals but as "MALES &FEMALES" and she felt the wife would always be talking all day... asking her husband & reminding him to get things done.. telling him the littlest details in her day... telling him her thoughts and feelings... while the husband would nod and might even doze off & get sick of her endless blabbing..

so i had to explain to cow some things i realized about males & females :

Woman think completely different than MEN.. what is so obvious to a woman does not usually occur to a man.. what WE think is the first thing that comes to our mind is the last that comes to theirs.. we feel talk IS communication... men feel talking must have a purpose... "give me a problem ill solve it " type of thing... Women think they are simple when they are so complex... men think they are complex when in reality they are really simple & easy to understand if you knew them well... Men are like big babies...

Conclusion is... MEN & Woman have had and will always have their differences.. that's how they were created... it shouldn't be a problem if they learn about those differences and adjust to them... if you are stubborn and so close minded thinking you are right & the other person is wrong.. things will definitely get worse...

its not about who is right or wrong.. or who wins... or even who is the strong one in the relationship.. its all about sacrifices... respecting & understanding each other.. loving each other without boundaries or limits...


p.s. cow slept by the end of this conversation :P

Why DoeS it Always Rain On Me?

i don't like to be negative.. and i don't like to believe that there is such a thing as bad luck... i don't like how people say everything is " 7asad" or "3ayn".. thier son trips they go like " ma7soood".. ( it could always be that he was running on wet floor)
someone gets a ZIT on their face.. they say its " 3ayn"
i usually would have said.. come on people.. 3ayn does exist but don't let it be the constant thought in your head...

but.. with the recent events... i've been told wallah hay " 3ayn 3alieki"... maybe its true because its unnatural what has been going on...

ofcourse you are all updated with the events in my life... most recent event is... that sharjah recently decided to make a RULE... awal ma they heard i am getting married.. they decided to make a rule that doesn't allow "ZAFFA" in hotels.. hmmm

i won't have a party... pretty much zaffa WAS the wedding... so now i have to look for another place in dubai... not only that.. the guy who was going to print my wedding cards... disappeared... one day he said i'm coming to your office 2moro.. next thing i know he doesn't pick up and is in india for an emergency...

all i seem to be hearing is bad news! mom's car broke down for no reason.. my friend's dad is in the hospital with a brain stroke like my dad.. my friend at work canceled her wedding because her uncle and grandmother are both extremely sick...another friend canceled her wedding because her dad got a brain stroke too..

Soooo.. what is going on? mawsim il jaltat wil wedding cancellation? is it possible someone has "3ayn" vibes spread on all the world especially the 3arayis!

people used to tell me " khaaafo min il 3anayhom zuru2 wa snaaanhum furu2" " you should fear those with blue eyes and a gap in between their teeth"

it is said that "3aynhum bitseeeb" lol

soo what about hazel eyes? do contacts affect the intensity of the "3ayn"?
hmmm what if someone had the "LAZIC" operation... would he have lazer 7asad? lol

i'm not saying 7asad & 3ayn don't exist.. they do.. and maybe i have been ma7sooda or 3alay il 3ayn.. but it's also maktoob 3ala every person what will happen to them... thinking WHY will drive you mad... just say al hamdulilah.. and know its for the best... if you feel better blaming it on your blue-eyed snaan furug neighbor then do that ... or blame it on that girl who stared at you all day long... blame it whoever you want...

whatever floats your boat :)

It's All About The $$$$$

"Money makes the world go round " is what people say... i think money makes the world go NUTS..

i used to say money is not a problem and its not the most important thing in life.. that there are other things that are more important like a person's faith health & love .

i still think those are more important BUT what i have realized is that money is not a problem when YOU HAVE IT... otherwise it could be... that to get good health and the best treatment you NEED money.. to get married and live the life you want with the one you love u also NEED money... i realized that without enough money love health & faith can be shaken..

Anyway... money...i would never ask for it even if i needed it..hamdulilah we are not in need of money... but i hate asking for anything or feeling that i need someones help in any way... i know its not right.. but i can't help it..

like now without a car i never ask for rides and well people have to insist on dropping me off.. i just can't deal with the idea that i could be a burden on someone.. or that someone would get out of their way to do something for me... or that they would do something just cause they feel its the right thing to do...

What i hate the most... is to finally say okay after they insist.. like for ex "pls let me drop you off... plz plz.. its no problem at all... you are on my way..." i eventually open up and think it's okay to need someone or to accept help i say.. "okay if you insist..."

till its time to go and she would say " oh sorry... i said i was going to drop you off... you are not exactly on my way.. but wait i'll drop you half way if you want"

then i'd say it's okay... i'd rather take a cab..... ( what i wish i said was)


I Never asked you to drop me off... you insisted...i would have never asked you..
& i hate to get in someones way...

*sigh

which brings me back to the main subject... COW has realized the importance of $$$ & has started her new JOB today! due to her inability to read or speak the work load is getting bigger...

:P

It's NOT ALL about YOU

The WHOLE world does not revolve around YOU.. when i say YOU i mean those people who somehow make any event that happens, no matter how trivial or significant it might be, they make everything ABOUT THEM ...

Those people who would come and just flip out and act like its okay to bite your head off just cause THEY are having a bad day...

Those people who say things like " i know that girl lost her parents in tsunami and is paralyzed and will not be able to pay for her treatment, I've been through worse!! I was swimming in jumaira beach once and i SWEAR i was about to drown! then i got bit by a jellyfish!! I FELT like i was going to die so i KNOW how she feels.. at least she doesn't have a jellyfish SCAR on her arm"

pssssssht * dinos Rolls eyes

I think we all tend to get a bit selfish and make things always about ourselves... i also know people do stupid things sometimes and say " It's MY LIFE ANA 7ur free to do what i want" unaware that sometimes THEIR stupid actions don't only affect them but the people around them...

Freedom of choice has nothing to do with being an IDIOT!

Someone who drinks and drives can kill innocent people and block traffic for hours!
Someone can suddenly go into "CANDYMAN/ FRIDAY 13th" mode and kill innocent people..

Unfortunately, as soon as ANYONE does something horrible they are not the only ones who suffer the consequences.. Every person comes from a certain group or is labeled
like for ex "ARAB,MUSLIM,PALESTINIAN,"

So if one arab or muslim does something bad.. automatically the WHOLE GROUP "shilleh"
is to blame...

IT's NOT ALL ABOUT YOU... it's NEVER just about you...

Choking Love

when i say choking love.. i am not using choking as a VERB.. but i am saying it as an Adjective to express how love can be choking sometimes...

Sometimes you feel a person loves you so so much to a point that it turns into possessiveness... it turns into a sort of unbearable clinginess, over protectiveness...

You feel you have to get away because you can't breathe... it's like poor cow who has to deal with my EXTRA loving! She seems to think she has grown up but to me she will always be a baby... i do express way too much and maybe i worry a bit too much too... but i have to realize she is not a kid anymore and will have her own baby cows to worry about someday! Glad humans don't eat their children like cats do when they are afraid they would get hurt.

If that was the case then there we would all be walking happy meals.


min al 7ubbi ma qatal.


i have to realize that by being over-loving and clingy i'm actually pushing people i love away rather than keeping them closer.... not everyone expresses love the same way you do... which is why each person should be free to express themselves the way they want to...

Shark Tale

I went to see an aquarium a while back and i was amused at the different types of fish and i still remember how the shark was "darib booz" swimming like he owned the place! ofcourse with my imaginative mind i imagined swimming in that huge tank.... and i thanked God fish can't think like humans do.. or they would create ways to come after US! :P

hyundai ad

:) here is something that made me laugh today.. thought i would share it with you

Tea Spill

the reason i don't blog much lately is because i feel my negative feelings and vibes will spread to the world so i try to save he negativity to myself and blog later when i'm back to "cheerful" mode..

but... then again the initial purpose of this blog is to vent & let out those negative feelings online rather than out on the people around me..

Let's say you are holding a very hot cup of tea... and for some reason you trip on something.. your hot tea is now not only spilt all over you.. but all over the person by your side... when you are hurt.. you usually unintentionally spill some of your anger and hurt on to the people closest to you...


so.. recently i have had not one.. not two but many slaps of reality... and i think i have been spilling most of my "TEA" on the closest people to me..

especially poor Cow :P who has her nieces visiting from "AMeriCana"

if i ever unintentionally burnt anyone by my "shay il wizza" im sorry...

Gat $aleemA

first let me just assure you that i don't make up stories.. and this blog is proof of how dramatic my life can get! Here is the story...

i was driving to the hospital to see baba.. and well te traffic light turned yellow and i knew i would miss it so i decided to slow down and stop when it turned red... and well i did... suddenly i hear someone hit the BREAKS.... EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE still unsure if that person would hit ME!! BOOOOOOOOOM! HE HIT MY CAR!! he was driving over 100 on a road with 70 speed limit!!! im so glad i was wearing a seatbelt... that no one was driving ahead of me!! it could of been much worse... so al hamdulilah...

i have to wear a neck brace for a while till my neck feels better.. nothing serious.. al hamdulilah.. but its the whole experience!!!

hope this is the end of the DRAMA!

Cow survived the crash with slight injuries.. and a broken leg :P

btw my car is useless now.. too damaged to be fixed.. so im carless now.. *sigh

yala al hamdulilah...

do u believe me now when i say... 7ayati FILM!

Hideaway

i need to get away... i wish i was invisible... i need time away from all the comments i hear.. people interfering in my life.. making my decisions 4 me ! if i need advice believe me i WILL ASK for it! Unwanted Advice is simply UNWANTED!

Does my face have " please interfere in my life?" written all over it?

*dinos looks in a mirror...NO SUCH LINE ON MY FOREHEAD...
hmmm ok there could be some spots on my forehead forming an illegible line :P

i do appreciate it when someone cares and asks about me and my dad's condition and tells me they are there for me...(but ONLY when they mean it )

but what i don't like is when people don't really care but call just " rafi3 3attab".. like its "socially expected" of them to do so.. so they will visit u and call u once and disappear.. those calls or visits are not what i need right now..

And if you have nothing nice to say.. pls don't say anything at all..

AND...whether or not i will wear a white dress to my wedding.. whether or not i will even HAVE a wedding...or who will i invite... etc. is MY business..

no one has any right to judge me for wanting to have this night... im not saying right NOW with these circumstances... but eventually i will inshala and no one has any right to make me feel guilty...

i dont want to hear anymore comments on how my wedding should be.. or where it will be or if there is going to be a wedding...


i dont want to hear anymore insincere " if you need anything im here for you" lines..
i know who is there for me and who isn't.. and i know who my true friends are... and who really cares..i surely don't need anymore guilt trips from anyone...

just had to vent....


btw cow and i decided to go to the jungle to meet her friends... :P

The M@$K

i've always felt like a moody person.. but recently it's not just mood swings it's more like extreme schizophrenic attacks... i feel like im in the movie " The Mask"

Sssssssssomebody SSSSSSStop meeee... :P

it's not denial.. i've accepted my dad's situation... i sure do hope he will recover... and i know it's for the best... but sometimes to deal with reality i try not to think about it.. i keep myself busy.. i do the things i usually do everyday... i go to work.. i blog.. i eat.. i sleep.. see my friends... but then there is that moment when im not busy.. when im not with anyone.. the moment when reality catches up with me...

it's like someone took away a part of me.. like something inside me has died and is rotting more and more each day.. like someone tore my arms off and im sitting there looking away from the wounds.. acting like nothing happened... looking away for so long that i forget what has happened....

but no matter how far away i look... there will come a moment when i need to pick something up or even scratch my nose and i realize i have no arms..my arms are not there and i can never run away from myself...

hamdulilah i do have my arms .. im just trying to express how i feel..

i didn't know how much my dad did for us and how much we relied on him...i took him for granted.. that he will always be there... i miss him ... i miss his loud voice.. i miss our few talks... i miss having him around ...

i hate to sound this depressed.. i usually use humor to deal with drama.. i do succeed most of the time.. but right now im not wearing my mask...

the mask i wear so often that i think sometimes i even fool myself... please take my advice and if your dad's are healthy and there.. dont take them for granted.. talk to them more... because eventually all you will have from your parents are these memories...

mama i love you habeebti inti.. i admire your strength & faith.. i know this all will pass... i don't ever want to see you cry..don't worry about us we are all going to be fine.. Allah kbeer & will take care of us all :) wa Allah yishfe baba soon


al hamdulilah

Funny Indian Ads

after seeing a few indian commercials i really would like to share these 2 with you all! i saw the second one too many times that the song " mmmmmmwaaaaah" aheeeeeeeeyaheeeeeyaaaaaaay is stuck in my head... lol so my advice don't watch more than 3 times lol

Drama Drama Drama

My life is so dramatic... its a soap opera... the weirdest things happen to me... so I'm back with another episode of my life.. in my week off work we woke up one night to the FIRE alarm at 4 AM in the morning... THERE WAS A FIRE IN OUR BUILDING! Nice... eh? lol

Anyway i got flashbacks the last time i woke up freaked out at 4 am not so long ago to hear my mom call the ambulance for baba... So..you can imagine the DRAMA! we had to leave the building as soon as possible for all we knew the whole building could be on fire... and to think of what are the things i want to take with me.. hmm EVERYTHING.. what do i have time take NOTHING!! i started going back and forth quickly in the room trying to wear the first thing i find in my face! thinking back im sure it looked like i was doing some sort of weird rap dance in the room jumping from one side to the other with confusion!!

SO... we ran down the stairs and i remembered and Egyptian movie i used to always watch when i was a kid.. ( don't know why i watched it though it was kind of not a movie for kid).. the movie's was " KARAKOON FIL SHAri3 " Adel imam and yusras house falls down and i remember the scene with all the people running out and each person was carrying something weird.. one guy had a TV with him! LOL

Anyway... so we went downstairs and i thought i looked weird with my abaya on top of my pyjama till i saw the rest of the people who were downstairs! Some were so scared they didn't even put much clothes on! now i understand the arabic saying " il ikhtashoooo maaato"..hmm how can i translate that without it sounding cheesy... " those who get shy will die" lol

soooooooo... the fire was in a shop in our building's ground floor... it was big but was put out and after 3 hours mitil il musharadeen in the streets we went back home... AL HAMDULILAH

glad it wasn't serious :)

And about my dad.. well right after my last post about him getting better he had seizures and was put back on the machines... then al hamdulilah 2 days ago he was able to breath again and is back off the machines... it's always up's an downs and you can never know what is going to happen next... Inshala ya Rab he will recover from this...

Al hamdulilah 3ala kol ishi ... ill keep you guys posted in my next episode

Favorite Video$

ill be off for a week starting today and i might nto get a chance to blog.. dad's condition is much better he is breathing on his own and is awake :) he also had "boootha" icecream yesterday.. recovery takes time... and lots of patience.. but i feel good al hamdulilah.. Allah kareem and he will be better soon inshala :)

here are a few videos i LOVE!!!! mashala at the talents all around the world!! i am still shocked at the baby imams!! And the BABY BREAKDANCER!! so enjoy these videos till i get back :) these baby videos show how the way you are brought up could definitely affect the way you will turn out! baby breakdancer vs. baby shiekh

sub7annaLLah

And pls don't stop your prayers they are WORKING :) al hamdulilah

Thank you all for your support! Allah yis3idkum Jamee3an :)

Numbness

i feel numb inside...

numbness... the lack of feeling.. perhaps it would be more accurate to say a lack of connection with our feelings or a disconnection from emotions..numbness is one way we protect ourselves against the onrush of pain and against being overwhelmed by suffering...

In my case its emotional pain, but don't we respond similarly to a physical blow with numbness before our pain sets in?

I remember once when i was in grade 4 i was playing hide and seek with a girl that was 3 times my size... well it was her turn to seek and i was peeking from behind a corner of a wall.. trying to see where she was... suddenly a heavy weight plunged at me from a distance.. .. i remember a BIG THUD!!!

everything was in slow motion... i was not quite aware of what was happening... the sound of the kids playing the playground faded out and i don't remember seeing anyone around me...(although i was surrounded by people).. i do remember there was a lot of screaming though..

my white t-shirt is now a dark shade of red...i was bleeding... the girl had tripped and fallen right on top of me... causing my head to hit the wall corner from top to bottom.. (ouch)

i don't remember feeling pain... i felt numb... confused... in shock.. it was only later on my way to the hospital that i felt a throbbing pain in my head...

that is what i feel now.. numb at what has happened... i know soon that excruciating pain will come... when i realize the severity of the wound...

Sometimes in the house i'd be plugging in something to the electricity and suddenly the electricity would go off...

just like dangerous surge of electricity will activate a circuit breaker and cut off the electricity to stop a fire or the chances of electrocution.. i feel a great deal of anguish will activate our emotional "circuit breaker" temporarily, so that we don't feel the pain...

self defense mechanism i guess..

Dad's condition is stable.. he opened his eyes.. can move one hand al hamdulilah... there are signs of recovery.. but to see him so helpless and weak brings so much sadness to my heart..

Allah y2awmoh bil salameh wa ysabirna.. all we have is our prayers... wa Allah Kareem

He Squeezed my HAND!

Yesterday i went to see my dad and as i was talking to him and then suddenly he opened his eyes... i was suddenly speechless.. i held his hand and i tried to think of what was the best thing to say to someone who just woke up from a coma and has tubes in his mouth and nose! the best thing to say to someone who in in so much pain and is unable to even express himself! i said " hamdila 3al salameh " i think i stuttered a bit...

its so funny how i get nervous when i talk to my dad.. like anything i say to him will sound stupid...

he is a serious man.. he doesn't usually get my jokes.. or gets them and decides to ignore them... :S anyway it was no time for humor.. i sat there saying how we miss him and how the house is depressing without him.. and then i felt him SQUEEZE my hand... i never thought such a simple gesture could stand for so much... i felt his pain.. i could hear his cry for help.. i felt his love.. i felt his sadness.. his confusion at why his lying in bed unable to get up or speak....

he would look around like a baby who is discovering the world for the first time... at that moment i felt like i was the parent.. sub7anallah


i felt helpless... but al hamdulilah.. he is getting better.. i don't really remember the last time i held his hand... i don't think i ever did. ( except for when i was a kid)

Allah yishfee :) i feel its everyones prayers being answered :) al hamdulilah

Life is a SIM card

ok why am i saying that? life is a sim card... a week ago it occurred to me how we are not so different from our phones when i again dropped my phone in water...

just like one drop of water in the wrong place can cause serious damage.. a drop of air in our bloodstream will cause immediate death... a drop of blood in the e brain causes sever brain damage... so we are left like a damaged phone... body is there but the memory is all lost... same phone... no connection to the world.. a body without a soul... or with a soul that is trapped in a body that is too damaged for it to even be seen...

we are more fragile than we realize... how could we be so weak yet so stubborn and ignorant? how could we know of this weakness and still act like we are invincible?
i guess its a blessing sometimes to be this ignorant.. imagine living in fear of death every second...

This past week i have learnt so many lessons.. believe it or not this week i have counted more blessings than i have in my life! i feel truly blessed.. and thankful..

Spending time in the hospital all day, i saw many stories that only made me feel more thankful... stories that happened to ppl and could've happened to anyone of us..

everyday i see a 30 year old man who had suffered from a brain stroke. he has been in the hospital for 11 months now.. and just recently he has opened his eyes and is showing signs of recovery.. i see his family around him everyday teaching him how to eat and speak again..

he has 4 kids and he was perfectly fine.. up until one day at work he was stressed out and had a brain stroke. His little daughter comes to the hospital everyday with a new song and sings it to him. She would hug him and sing to him and his wife said he tried to snap his fingers as she sang to him!

i see kids that are born crippled or paralyzed. And even though they are the way they are they are the most cheerful kids i have ever seen.. laughing and smiling and playing..

i see a 5 year old kid using a walker because she is born with crooked legs... i see an old man who has been in ICU in a coma for 6months and no one hardly visits him.

i see all sorts of people from all around the world and i realize that no matter how different we might seem.. we are all the same.. all holding on to the people we love.. holding on to life.. with everything that we have.


i feel blessed to have a father to worry about... some people are born into families without parents... i feel blessed to have my health and my family and loved ones around me helping me go through this everyday.. i feel blessed that we have enough money to afford a hospital while some people die because they can't afford the costs of hospitals & operations.. i feel blessed that i have faith at times like this when i know lots of people tend to lose their faith in God.. i feel blessed because everything that happens to us happens for a reason & with Faith and Patience (Sabr) God will reward us by taking away from our sins...

al hamdulilah... ina ma3 al 3usri yusra


another blessing is that now with all those ppl calling me i got my contacts back with extra numbers kaman :)

Sad Friday

its the first friday without my dad being home... he has travelled before and i have not seen in in months sometimes but this is different.. i keep telling myself he travelled somewhere... but then reality crawls back into my head and i realize what has happened..

I think fridays are harder than any other days to cope with this.. since i hardly saw him except on friday.. he would always wake up early and then we would all have the "FRIDAY Ftooor" which usually includes Fool Farouq <-- FArouq is baba..

so... b4 that he would always love to go to carfour and get all sorts of food! he loves food wa iza FE any OFFER in the world he will get it.. if you take a look in our kitchen you find boxes and boxes of biscuits and chocolates... and probably no one has ever heard of them! And when we say " baba la meen kol haaad? ma 7ada ra7 yakloh!" he says " ANA bowkloh" :S

see a major reason he is where he is right now is how careless he was when it comes to food! he would eat all sorts of baskoot and BAGLAWA and tabeekh without even tryin to khafif!! :(--

Anyway.. i keep remembering the time he would come and ask me to go to carfeour with him or to any dicsount center and id refuse and say " ma fee ishi hnaak" or " mush jay 3ala bali"... it hurts so much when it finally occurs to me that it was never about those discount centers.. it was his way of asking me to spend time with him..

whats even sadder is that now when i go and talk to him... i find my tongue tied and i feel like i cant say anything.. the same feeling i got when he was awake.. i want to tell him how i feel.. how i miss him.. how sad i am when i go home without him here.. how i am sorry i wasnt the best daughter... and all i can say is " baba ana hown"

we sense he can hear us.. he blinks when we talk to him and i feel inshala with all those prayers he will recover .. YA RAB....

Dad's in a Coma

let me say it again maybe this time it will sink in... Dad is in a coma... my dad? how ???? why can't i believe it? why can't i understand that this is happening..
we spend our whole lives planning and planning for things and then suddenly what we never expect happens and we sit there feeling shocked and helpless...

the day before he was fine.. making jokes.. eating.. laughing.. i rememeber thinking i have never seen him this happy... suddenly at night i hear mom telling my brother to call and ambulance.. it was like a nightmare only i was awake.. i go in the room to only see my dad in bed unable to move or speak.. his face was half paralyzed.. and that is teh image that has been haunting me.. to hear him moan with pain.. knowing he is trying to SAY something.. but CANT! the look in his eyes while the ambulance struggled to carry him away to the hospital...

everything was in slow motion.. still is in slow motion.. all i remember is those times i culd of spent with him and i chose to sit in my room or on the phone talking to someone else.. i think of all the talks we never had.. the things i couldnt say..

the funny thing is the first time i ever kissed his hand was when they were carrying him away to the ambulance... i try not to cry to be strong... but its so hard..

All i can do is pray... and the reason im bloggin now is because i want you ALL to pray for him.. please please.. i believe the more we pray the sooner he will get better..

LA hawla wala Quwata il Billah... Only GOd has the strength to make everything okay... Wa ina lila wa ina ilayh raji3oon... wa al hamdulilah.. Allah ysabirna wa ya2awmo bil salmeh ya RAB

ghirig talaaaaafooooni

ok i didnt have to time to illustrate the situation.... but again... i manage to drop my phone in a PUDDLE of WATER.... i usually have it in my lap when i sit in the car.. and well usually i drop it when i leave the car forgetting its IN MY LAP...

yesterday as i was going to see the wedding card ( very stressed out and ANGRY) cause they seem to hear my words in CHINESE!! anyway i leave the car and i hear...

PLOP... and i was like to myself " what was that?" hmmmm i decided to ignore the sound lol and as i was still about to walk away from the car i see something familiar.. only it was in a puddle of water(and 6eeneh) since it RAINED yesterday...

it was my poor (abused) phone... lol by the time my stressed out brain cells sent a brain mag for me to PICK IT UP.. it was already MSAGSAG :P

now again i lost my numbers... and wallahi i know i should have written them down i DID plan on doing that... il muhim.. conclusion is... i never learn from my mistakes.. and BARAKIZISH!!! :S

anyway watch this next video... NO COMMENT LOL the arab micheal jackson song!

hoookay hookay everysing hooooookay

wallahi i really hope they are joking.. to think they are singing SERIOUSLY! haha

Going Against the Tide

Did you ever get the feeling that you were stuck in a bottle drifting away with the waves.. tides taking you side to side till eventually you reach a waterfall and you you can see it.. and you know you are heading for a BIG FALL but you feel helpless.. the tide is too strong.. and you can't do much right now...

you know you can swim but you also can't reach the water.. stuck in a bottle...
you know you can scream for help.. but again the bottle is sound proof..
you know you don't belong here.. the tide is taking you in the opposite direction..

its just hard to go AGAINST THE TIDE... i feel both ways... u drown...

and when i say tide here i dont mean tide lil ghasseel :P or ariel.. :P

BowmA!!

many don't believe me when i tell them the weird stories and experiences i go through.. and today is just another STORY to share...

no i didn't swallow any dababees.. and no i didn't get lost in a desert with more cows but well i saw AN OWL!!! i kind of have the feeling owls don't usually hang out on office windows!!

you know when we were kids i remember my mom used to use the word " ya bowma" to express how someone is nikdeh... : liesh mbawma lol that was always confusing to me.. why the bowma tashbeeh... up until today.. where i met the BOWMA.. it all made sense... now i can worry abt the 100000 other questions in my mind lol

bowmas tend to look a bit depressed... i tried to make it smile.. to prove all those ppl wrong... but ja7aratni :P

i thought of keeping it as a pet but it looks like it had the bird flu... for it to come to an office window instead of a tree.. major sign lol

my life is full of surprises

Funny Video

one of the funniest videos i have seen in a while! mashala very talented :)
enjoy!!!

The COUNTDOWN Begin$

so... i havent been blogging i know.. but you know the countdown has started.. i still can't belive im getting married! it feels like yesterday i was blogging about finding " THE ONE lol now that he found me.. its just too much info that i need to sink in...

i mean its the first wedding i go to where im the "3arooosa".. truth is im not really stressed out YET.. but i just feel there is so much going on .. too much responsibilities.. decisions.. deadlines.. people involved..and i know i tend to forget a lot.. and at this time my memory is very CRITICAL :S forgetting now might cause irrepairable damage...

you know how ppl say.. its your night.. do what you want.. don't bother with people because people wont even remember this night.. and no matter what you do you cant please everyone... that is what i have been hearing and i TOTALLY AGREE....couldnt AGREE MORE......BUT... the reality of the matter is... its not just your night...
its FOR the people.. and there are EXPECTATIONS & there are lots of people who will interfere... lots of money will go to waste.. lots of arguments will arise... lots of unwanted advice..and so on... everyone means well... and they assume they know what you want.. or what is best for you.. not knowing u and them ARE soooo completely different & have different taste..

oh not forget to mention those calls or msgs i am getting from people i hardly remember or even know who say " oh am i invited?" & im like.. emm emmm (you know i7raaj kteer) so i go like.. yeah SURE... but in the back of my head im like.. WHO ARE YOU lol

I just hope i don't trip... & that everything works out because im this close to eating my COW!!!! :P

Anyway.. pls id3oooooooli ya nass.. i hope i dont reach that BRIDZILLA GODZILLA phase

Time Flie$

don't you sometimes sit in shock at how fast time passes you by!! I mean especially on those days when you come across a relative or friend you haven't seen in ages.. but somehow you remember their cute little baby boy who once threw up all over you & then u changed his diapers!! So you ask how is your kid? they laugh and say well he is right here in front of you... and u look up to see that he is now TALLER THAN U! i mean HOW HOW HOW?? its just WEIRD! now its like i have to wear hijab in front of him and well it seems like not soo long ago i was carrying him around singing him " 7adba7lak 7ammaaaam" :P

have u noticed how the songs we sing to kids are a tad bit disturbing & graphic! like for example " 7adba7lak 7ammam".. i will slaughter pigeons for you! lol

anyway.. back to my topic.. TIME.. they say time flys when u are having fun... and i think it might pass by faster when u NEED IT!!

conclusion is... we waste so much time in our lives and we are simply just getting old people!!! :P


Any hooooooooo :P here is a really funny link i came across today! a jordanian cartoonist ... CHECK IT OUT :) Omar Cartoons

I NeeD $leeP

i love sleeping.. i can take a nap at anytime! i love weekends because i get to sleep in the MORNING! Anyway... even on those days when u finally CAN sleep SOMEONE or SOMETHING wakes u up.. like the next door neighbors having a fight or the sound of someone drilling a wall somewhere! or maybe even the smell of someone smoking in the house.. you feel the smoke is going straight to your brain cells... ARGHH

you try and try to ignore all those annoying sounds & smells... and instead of them going away .. they get louder by the second..you realize there is no use... you are now awake.. and furious... sleepy but " raaaa7at il nowmeh" can't sleep anymore...

im sure many of you have shared this experience with me at one point in thier life...
or when you are in bed.. soo soo tired.. and just when u started to get comfortable in your warm bed..a very ANNOYING ALARM goes off!

You move from la la land to REALITY... U HAVE TO GO TO WAKE UP for WORK
"lugmet il 3aysh sa3bah yaboy"! You sometimes choose to break the alarm or ignore it and go back to bed... but usually doing that too often will get you fired eventually!

Sigh.. i guess this is life... :P bidi anaaaaaaM

Prayer$ An$wered

Yesterday my dad had an operation for the "disc" he has in his neck... AL HAMDULILAH he is okay now.. recovering from the operation.. got me thinking about life.. and how we alway get so caught up in life.. so caught up that we dont remember God as much as we should.. or we do remember God but yet have a lot of contradictions in our life... we might even bend or break a few rules to make them more "modern" or "socially acceptable"

till one day you really want something and you also know its ONLY in God's hands.. you have always known everything is in GOD's hands.. but in that moment you feel desperate and pray more and say things like " ill never do this again" or " God if you answer this one prayer i wont ask you anything again".. an so on..

maybe you meant what you said and deep inside you know you might NOT deserve to get your prayers answered because you have been too distracted & have so many sins in your life... but still you know GOD is forgiving.. and MERCIFUL.. so you pray because you know HE is always there no matter what happens...

ive had ppl say things like " ill tell my mom or bint il jeeran to pray for me because i havent prayed in years!! so i would feel bad if i prayed now just cause i need something".. that is not how it should be.. God asked us to pray ... and we all should :)
not only when we need something like a "job offer" or "3arees" lol

Allah KAREEEEM :)

186 و إذا سألك عبادي عني فإني قريب أجيب دعوة الداعِ إذا دعانِ فليستجيبوا لي وليؤمنوا بي لعلهم يرشدون " البقرة "

When My servants ask thee concerning Me, I am indeed close (to them): I listen to the prayer of every suppliant when he calleth on Me: Let them also, with a will, Listen to My call, and believe in Me: That they may walk in the right way.

Unfortunately the cycle repeats itself.. we all go through ups and downs and we don't always keep our end of the promise... out of weakness, laziness or temptation..

But i also know God created us and HE knows of our weaknesses and life is full of tests we all go through.

Prayers can sometimes make miracles happen :) Al hamdulilah for everything :)

so conclusion is..

" YOU GOT TO PRAY.. YOU GOT TO PRAY JUST TO MAKE IT TODAY" <-- said like a true MC HAMMER :P

Lion Hug

wow... when i saw this i was so touched.. after 6 years this lion still remembers the lady that rescued him... i never knew LIONS HUG!!!! awwwwwwwwwww *eyes tearing

Mush Tabee3i?

Sorry i haven't blogged in a while.. been kind of busy.. but well the less i blog the more things i feel i need to blog about! You know how sometimes you are in a situation and someone says or does something and you say something like " mush tabeeee3i jad jad ABNORMAL" or " i CANT BELIEVE HE DID THAT?" or " if i was in her place i would never DO THAT?"

and we tend to get a bit judgmental when we compare ourselves to others and we get carried away with our judgments not realizing that they are nothing but false accusations we base on our reference to ourselves & our experiences..

We have to realize that we are all different.. not even 2 people in this WHOLE world are exactly the same.. we might agree more with some ppl.. disagree with others.. want to avoid a few because they GET ON YOUR NERVES :P

BUT we also might find a lot in common with someone.. and when we do meet that person we feel is our "LONG LOST TWIN" we tend to assume they are like us in every way.. when in reality they are THEM and YOU are YOU..

not ONE person is like you in EVERY single way... and knowing that.. we should ACCEPT that different people react differently..and ACCEPT people for who they are instead of trying to turn them into YOU !

And just because someone doesn't react like you doesn't mean they are wrong.. doesn't even mean you are wrong.. it just means you are different... different yet normal

And speaking of normal.. what is normal ? a normal reaction? i feel that there is no such thing as "normal".. the definition of normal nowadays is what is common... and as soon as someone decides to go against the tide or be unique or original... they are seen as abnormal or weird.. plus being NORMAL IS OVERRATED :P

id rather be SPECIAL ( not the special that is thrown in mental hospitals though) :P

3anyway... point is... each person is different and expresses themselves differently.. a poet could write a poem.. a singer could sing a song.. a painter could paint you a portrait.. but just because they are talented and have the gift of expressing themselves in better ways .. doesnt make their love stronger or deeper or more real...

:)yet another one of my more serious posts...

H@ppY Birthd@Y G@LBI!!

Today is not a normal day....it is unlike any other... it should be down in history.. it should be an official holiday!

On this day .............. 7amooda was born!!

7abeebi kol sana wa inta salim wa mursi wa 3abbas :P no really kol sana wa intcha tchayip

You know before i met you i thought i was crazy :P now i know i am

im simply crazy about you *maksoof shy face*

With you in my life i feel nothing else matters.. You make everything ok..


IF i woke up with a really bad hair day and tripped on a banana..also realized i had the biggest zit in the middle of my face.. got fired for being late to work too many time..got sick .. then heard the worst news.. then got stuck in tsunami but somehow survived with many psychological and phycisal scars.. same day i find out i got robbed & someone i care about decides to hate me overnight... then got aressted for robbing my own house lol then on the way to jail had an accident that made me lose my memory & ability to speak... with all that happening.. i know if i forgot everything i would still remember YOU... and if i couldnt speak i would just want to speak to tell you how much i love you... :P And if all that happened in one day... knowing you are there would make it all okay

so conclusion of this long story is that if one day i woke up & everything possible in the world was going wrong... i would think of you.. and it all would be okay

you are EVERYTHING to me :) ALLah ma yi7rmeni minak ya GAlbi

Ba7777777obak Gawi Gawi... :P

I LOVE YOU MORE THAN CHOCOLATA!

ITs your first birthday as a 3arees! ya bakhtak :P ok i forgot this is my blog :P

Been Barbequed

Im hereeee... well havent been blogging much since there has been a lot going on lately... time "dubbans" time flys :P ok that was soo lame... *someone throws tomatoes on dino

So after the many cloudy days i did something crazy... i EXPOSED MYSELF TO THE SUN!!

*scene from a vampire movie when dina sees the light she melts lol actually more like BURNS!!

im glad to say i am no longer snow white... but i can't say being RED & BURNT is much better lol
i remember how my ta ta ( grandma) always would argue that being WHITE is something SACRED! like tanning to her is just VERY SURPRISING! ino ma32ool 7ad abyad bido yismar?! il nas btishtire fair and lovely 3ashan tibyad!!

anyway... after hanging out in the sun for a long time.. and not listening to 7amooda when he said " 7uteee Sunscreen" i am now suffering the consequences.... ok i sense i will be blabbing now and no one will understand a word i say.. but i need to just write my thoughts down...

as i was contemplating on my daily life events... i started thinking of the many times we under or overestimate things in life...
how sometimes we don't realize the intensity of certain events.. or the impact they have on our life... till the moment passes us by... all we are left with are those burns... U know at that point that u are under the SUN.. and you are most likely to get burnt but you are denial and are taken away with the coolness of the water that you really don't realize how bad ou are burnt till later on...

how someone could get so many bumps on his head.. walk normally afterwards.. ignoring the little headaches and signs that something is wrong.. " underestimating" the real situation... till one day ... he finds out he has been suffering from major internal bleeding that he was unaware of all this time...

ok fhimto ishi? how i got that from being burnt in the sun... lol tis2aloooneeesh....

il muhim.. next time im taking TANJARIT SUNSCREEN!

Funny Video$

here are 2 hilarious ABU MAHJOOB videos & an adorable sleepy baby

In6aggiet ( been tagged) :P

ok been tagged.. but im using a computer that doesnt have arabic and the questions are in arabic.. so i will not only answer the questions but translate them :) i might as well answer an email tag i recieved here :) ok here i go * rubs hands together with anticipation

1. NAME: Dina SIGN : 3aquirius :P

2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
i am not sure but i sure do hope its not the ra2asa!!

3. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?
yesterday

4. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
sometimes.. depends on the pen & the mood :)

5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE MEAL?
hmmm yummm are we talking tabeekh? shush barak... if we are talking itlian its pasta *drools :P (stomache growling)
& in general.... anything with chocolate!

6. KIDS?
I ADORE kids!! up until they reach that annoying age where they ask alot of questions and start losing their teeth... those kids get on my nerves :P

7. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Awww... id be friends with me.. then one day we would decide to meet "ME" and i would show up with a COW.... then i would avoid me forever lol

8. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL?
I used to.. then i found out that sometimes forgetting things is a blessing... why REMIND yourself of the crappy expereinces when the real good ones are never forgotten.. plus you never know if it may fall into the wrong hands ;)


9. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?
ALLLL THE TIME <--- said like the kid from sixth sense when asked how often he sees dead people :P

10. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
YES do u want them?

11. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
hmmm no knowing how the weirdest things always happen to me i would not risk that :S

12. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE CEREAL?
Coco Pops

13. Chicken or MEAT?

firaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaakh... i always prefer chicken... u know ofcourse with the whole cow obsession thing going on chicken is expected :P


14. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG PHYSICALLY OR MENTALLY?

hmmm when u say physically strong are u asking if i can carry a car? :P then no.. if i can open a bottle of water on my own then yes... if i will be in any boxing match.. then no :S

Now Mentally... i was always a bright child :P now im so bright bathweeee bilayl :P...i tend to get carried away with my imagination sometimes...i haven't cracked any codes or made any scientific discoveries YET

so i guess ill go for mentally :)

15. What is your favourite ice cream?

Choco-Brownie Madness or Cookies & Cream with EXTRA FUDGE ( ya salaaam )

16. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
Thier smile, eyes & teeth

17. RED OR PINK?

BINK :P

18. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVOURITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?

hmmm over sensitivity sometimes

19. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?

at the moment ahmed :)

20. DO YOU EVER TALK TO YOURSELF?
Yes... only when im SLEEPING :)

21. IF YOU WERE A FRUIT WHAT WOULD YOU BE?

huh? ana fruit salad :P well i guess id be a strawberry cause my cheeks usually get red


22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?

Purple.. but why would i be a crayon is the better question lol

23. FAVOURITE SMELL?
the smell of baby powder on babies :)

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?

a wrong number... the call last for 5 seconds and it was like..

me :ALooo..
mr. X: HAAH?
me: Aloo?
mr X : HAAAAAH?
me : HAAAAAH?

ToooooooT

25. FAVOURITE DRINK?
Iced White Mocha yummm... but you dont want to see me after im high on caffiene

27. FAVOURITE SPORT TO WATCH?
id rather watch a movie.. but if i really had to watch a sport.. it would be.. no bideeeeesh to watch sports .. :S

28 FAVORITE COLOR?

TERIKIWAAAAAAZ

29. MORNING OR NIGHT?
Not a morning person AT ALL :) i hate waking up early...


30. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?

used to .. now i have LAZER VISION * dino looks at a banner that is really far away and uses her "ZOOM" option to see it more clearly... crowd GASPS with AMUSEMENT :P

31. FAVOURITE PLACE?
hmmm to me its not about the place its the company :) as they say.. il JANNAh min ghier naaas ma BTINDAAS :P


32. YOUR DREAM ?

going to hajj with Ahmed someday inshala :) & to memorize the quran one day

33. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Persuit of HappYness... *tears at the memory of the movie hehe

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Summer in summer and winter in winter :P i like both...

35. HUGS OR KISSES?

Definitely HUGS

37. FAVOURITE DESSERT?

Paradise Pie from Chilies!! *akhhhhh

38. HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOU PERSONALITY?

6aaaaaaagaaah <-- as my cousin laloo would say :P im simple... sometimes im silly.. i like to make ppl smile... get along with pretty much anyone... im naturally HIGH :P

39.ARE YOU MOODY?

hmmm Sometimes... i get major mood swings but i get out of them quickly.. * dino laughs and then crys as she types :P


40.WHAT QUALITIES HAVE YOU TAKEN FROM YOUR FATHER?

his stubborness & i think my dad was an artist bil zamanat .. i think i got some of my talent from Papeee

41. WHAT QUALITIES HAVE YOU TAKEN FROM YOUR MOM?

her eyes & her love for kids & kindness... lots tell me i look like her & that i have her smile


i think enough questions for one day.... i cant believe i was bored enough to answer them... and i cant believe people actually READ WHAT I WRITE :)

TV Hypno$i$

Maybe most of you would relate to this daily experience. You are passing by the living room and you really don't plan on sitting in front of the tv but you are suddenly drawn to some scene from a movie or show.. so you say ok ill stand for 5 minutes till this scene is over then i will go do something useful... the scene turns out being a whole movie.. you have now been sitting infront of the TV for the past 4 hours... and that was not your initial plan.... :S you are now a couch BATATA!!

its like this invisible magnetic force field that you get caught into & once you are in... its hard to just stand up and leave!

We have decided not to get a tv in our house inshala... i hope we will able to live without it... to think of all the free time we would have instead of watching tv! Television is actually one of the main reasons families have lost thier "bond". When there is TV the whole family are sitting in one room staring at a screen but they don't interact together or have normal conversations.

Anyway i imagined how my life would be with a tv and KIDS!! Id be hypnotized by the tv while our very hyperactive kid will run around destroying the house! :P ok i tend to exaggerate a bit :P but conclusion is i think tv is addictive and when i think of all the time i spent infront of a screen....of how many hours i spent from my life watching tv.... it freaks me out :S

Cow Ther@pY

After cow chose to go out with the "mgali3" player Bull behind my back... she hates to admit that i was right about him... anyway.. its not about who is right and who is wrong... now she is heart broken and is going through a very weird phase where she is doing all sorts of things she wouldnt usually do... like she is punishing herself ...

she got piercings and tatoos all over her body... she started smoking... swearing a lot... dresses up in a very inappropriate way...sleeps all day or listens to a lot of heavy metal... songs with titles like " ABUSE ME" and " SUICIDAL DREAM"... i feel she has a problem talking to me because she feels i lecture her a lot.. so instead i feel this unbreakable barrior between us... a loud silence everytime we sit together.... that is if we DO sit together...

she keeps saying " Even the richest COWS end up Burgers in Burger KING or McDonalds eventually"

*sigh*

So... i suggested therapy... and there is no shame in seeking help.. sometimes letting things off your chest even to a total stranger helps... Did you know an average person has around 50,000 negative thoughts a day!

Depression is something everyone goes through at some point in their life... it varies from person to person.. at how serious is it & how long it lasts.. It is usually caused by traumatic experiences or disappointments in life... It all about perception and when someone is happy the sky is blue, the birds are singing and when he is depressed the sky is grey and everything sounds like noise to you..

Here is some information about some of the different kinds of depression :

Mild Depression :

The symptoms of this form of depression include low self-esteem, a general feeling that nothing's worth doing, and a lack of interest in activities that used to be pleasurable. It's the most common form of depression, and is easily mistaken by others as simple unhappiness. Many people go through this type of depression, and recover from it, without really understanding what happened to them. Believe it or not a person suffering from mild depression has a more realistic perspective in life opposed to someone who is too optimistic with unrealistic goals.

Major Depression

Few people experience major depression without it becoming very obvious to those around them that they are depressed. The symptoms are similar to those of mild depression, but much worse. The lethargy can be so profound that the sufferer has trouble even getting out of bed, while any interest in previously-enjoyable activities will have gone. Loss of appetite & the desire for social interaction; all these will have significantly reduced. Feelings of guilt, worthlessness and despair can be so powerful that sufferers of major depression are prone to have suicidal thoughts, or even to attempt suicide.

Manic depression
A less common form of depression is manic depression, in which the sufferer has dramatic mood swings, from depression to mania. One day they may feel as though their world is about to end, while another day they'll be fantastically, unrealistically optimistic and cheerful. People suffering from manic depression are often artistic, and express their pain through their art.

Post-natal depression
Having a baby is a major change in anybody's life.The birth of a child makes a big difference to the hormone levels in the mother. With the sleepless nights, extra pounds and additional stress of coping with new demands on the mother's time and attention, it's not surprising that some women slip into a state of mild depression after childbirth. In some cases this can become major depression.

So.. point is... we all have gone through or will go through depression at a certain point in our life.. my advice is to not let yourself move from mild depression to major depression by realizing what the cause is... deal with it rather than sleep it away.. talk about it to someone close to you if you don't like the idea of therapy...

And believe it or not its all in your head.... its a DECISION you make.. DECIDE to be happy.. to GET OVER your depressing thoughts.. replace them with POSITIVE thoughts...

Life does not always go as planned.. you WILL make mistakes..you WILL make wrong decisions...you will suffer the consequences... the bull could break your heart.. but this is life.. don't dwell over your mishaps.. don't curse your fate.. dont blame yourself or punish yourself... just try to LEARN from your experiences..

there could be a million reasons to feel depressed... but i believe if you find just ONE good reason not to be.. if its good enough...those reasons fade away.... everything happens for a reason... and if you don't see its for the best at that same instant you learn later on that GOD loves you...

Everything you go through.. whether if its good or bad.. is part of a bigger plan for you.. have faith in God
because your happiness is in HIS hands..

If you go the wrong path... and you realize you are on the wrong path.. its never too late to turn back... its like taking a wrong turn... you either go farther away and deeper to dark scary roads that could lead to another country... or you realize you took a WRONG turn... and just simply GO BACK... to the right path...

If you are depressed... read a lot of quran :) it helps...

Quotes i like :

Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.

I lived my life knowing that when i look back at my tears i'd laugh, but i never knew looking back at my laughs i would cry

The art of life is the art of avoiding pain. ~Thomas Jefferson

ok i talk way too much....

How 2 MANSAFING

all you people who have been to jordan and have tried mansaf will find this hilarious! And if not u will have all the jordanian "turath" in one video! LOL

i love when he says "6argi3 asab3ak" hahhahaha "da7bir"

omg sho gordunieh il mus6ala7at!! :P

V@LENTINE$ D@Y

i have noticed changes in COW... she has not only been wearing corsets and watching her diet.. she has also gotten hair extensions & has started to wear a lot of make up and short skirts!! Since i have had cow ever since she was a baby i feel like her parent and that is my duty to help her make her choices in life... she is at a very critical age.. and i knew i would face it one day.. the age where she is thinking about marraige and love & bulls :P and to see her change into this cow barbie with superficial thoughts & not to forget to mention the way she has become "Bull Crazy"... is very hard on me...

Since its almost valentines day she has to choose between 6owr 1 who is very educated& sweet...her even learned how to WRITE... still working on the spelling though... his fashion sense is... lets just say.. he has no sense of fashion and in the fashion book it is called " FASHION SUICIDE"... but then again he is a sweetheart and would treat cow like a COW-QUEEN

Then we have 6owr 2... who is a barn drop out... very spoilt.. smokes a lot of "7asheesh"... mentioned he has been modeling in many magazines for the "horoscopes" taurus section... I dont sense he is serious about cow... and i personally dont like him at all... but i admit he knows how to dress and is charming when he talks...

So.... now... would you go for the sweet adorable yet clumsy and not so cute 6owr or the Hot "Mgale3" one lol

i don't like either and im telling her to wait till she gets the right 6owr & that the most important thing in such situations is to base your decision not only on looks & emotions but logic too... *sigh*

NICE AD$

Hiyaaaaa!!

you know what im going to write about has nothing really to do with the pic i drew but well i just felt like drawing cow doing some karate! hehe

What i want to vent about today is how sometimes you work so hard for something... all your life you have focused on that one thing... sacrificed for it... like making a sculpture out of little objects you would collect every day.. and everyday you would add to it.. truely you did all that you could to make it look its best... And all your hard work has paid off now.. its a great peice of art....

till one day in a moment of anger, stress.. with one big "HIYAAAAAAAAAA" you break everything you have worked for all your life.. you are left with regret maybe even confusion at how in one second all those years of hard work could simply vanish...

your sculpture is now nothing but a mess... and its all your fault... you can't take back the things you did... or said... and even if you tried some things are just not fixable... it will never be the same...

moral of the story.... think before you speak people... because words are like bullets once you "6ukh" the person infront of you either kill them or leave them seriously injured!! Yes we all face problems & life isn't exaclty a walk in the "gneenah" & there is always someone to blame for our psychological problems.. but... choose your words carefully cause they could cause serious damage.... & unecessary DRAMA!!