Package Friends

 So.. have you ever been in a situation where you have a friend you like very much only this friend is best friends with someone you don't like. So every time you want to see her she brings along this other person you can't stand! Eventually you stop seeing her as well because they come a package. 

I actually respect and admire friends that are so loyal to each other but if your friendship crosses boundaries to the point she gets upset that you have other friends and can’t see anyone without her then maybe you have to rethink if your friendship has healthy boundaries.

Believe it or not sometimes too much love and this sense of possessiveness will only lead to one person eventually feeling suffocated and controlled.

Not everyone gets along and that’s okay so you don’t need to come as a package. 

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Sephora Teens!

 

So now that I'm a mom of teens I realize how different this generation is from ours. Now its so normal for kids to school with full makeup and nail extensions. I don't remember when I actually started putting on makeup or using any face care. Even though now I am at an age where I need to have a face care routines I can't commit to daily face care. Most important daily routine is to make sure to remove my morning eye booger. ( ok too much garaf info)

So my teen daughter is invited to a birthday and what is common now is the birthday WISHLIST which I sent to the friends attending the birthday. Let me know write you a few items on that list given to my daughter

CHANEL lip gloss

TOO FACED MASCARA

PRADA PERFUME

RARE BEAUTY HIGHLIGHTER 

HUDA BEAUTY PERFUME

DRUNK ELEPHANT ( hmmm shaklo alcoholic)

that's just a few.. and I feel so shocked how now this is the NORM. Never in a million years did I imagine buying this stuff for 10 and 12 or even 15 yr olds! What happened to good old thoughtful gifts that are not super expensive ? I am trying to remember what I used to get when I was their age. Wait I actually didn't even have bday celebrations. Only makeup I was allowed was LABELLO Lip balm and I used to pinch my cheeks to get them red. 

Thing is these kids have perfect baby skin that they spend hours applying super expensive creams and serums on. ( creams for anti-aging meant for people like me) They make ( get ready with me vlogs) before school or before going out. 

I wasn't allowed a phone at their age and I didnt really go out with my friends or put makeup :S 

I just don't want my kids to not value money and to get too caught up in this trend of just buying expensive stuff they don't need that might actually harm them with subjecting their perfect skin to anti-aging chemicals. Many times I can't even justify buying this stuff for myself!

Anyway... just venting here.. Sephora generation.. * tut tut tut * hand on hand like a teta shaking head disappointed  then Dino  applies labello lip balm and applies vasline on dry cracked heels :P

P.S. when pinching your cheeks to get the natural blush doesn't work feel free to slap yourself or ask someone to slap you haha

Dreams

 

So as I am lying awake with a million thoughts racing in my head.. thoughts like ..why did I hit the pavement again today while driving and get a flat tire?? Did I have to eat that yummy sandwich knowing the consequences? When will the series “severence” come out?  How were the pyramids built? Why is called a fire truck when it is actually a water truck! In Grade 2 if that teacher didn’t make me stand in line too long to ask her to go to the toilet I wouldn’t have peed myself ( and on her) when it was my turn in line ! 

But my constant thought is I can’t believe the amount of horrific things that are going on in the world mostly Palestine Lebanon Sudan and so many other places facing live Genocide Starvation & endless pain and suffering as we watch helplessly ☹️

So I am trying to distract myself by blogging.. I think of my bed as a wireless charger and I think of myself as a broken phone that fell way to many times on the floor with a broken screen and has also fell in the toilet but managed to survive after sitting in a pile of rice 🤣 miraculously this phone still works but most times the signals are lost and also the wireless charger won’t always work 🙃 

I don’t know why I ended up taking about this when my main topic is DREAMS! So I was thinking of how we get the weirdest absolutely most ridiculous dreams and in the end you find out that even those might have meaning !

I remember before I got married I’d dream of shoes and my trying on different shoes. Little did I know these shoes were potential suitors (عرسان) and Colors of the shoes had a meaning . Green was Deen . Black was wealth . Till one day I dreamt of a nice shiny shoe and it fit perfectly and 2 weeks later I was engaged. When I tell my husband I dreamt of a shoe and it turns out it was you! He doesn’t appreciate my humour ! But wallah I’m not making this dream stuff up🤣 

Disclaimer : no offence is intended for any kondara out there.. so does this mean all men are kkkaaa….takkeeeet!! 

Ana ma olt ishi.. ( didn’t say anything)

*group of men throw shoes at Dinos 

So in conclusion your dreams have meaning even the weirdest ones . Maybe soon I’ll share some of my Bollywood style dreams with you . 

Stalker? Me??

 So I admit that I am indeed a professional stalker and my friends know if they can’t find info about that certain someone of interest who isn’t on any social media I am surely to be the one to find all the juicy info. 

There is some sense of joy and sense of accomplishment you feel when you finally find that valuable information in unlikely places. So here I am admitting that after many years of experience I am officially one of the best online stalkers out there. 

When there is a will there is always a way. I am not proud of this.. actually maybe I am. It takes a lot of effort and thinking to find out things 🤣 and this made me wonder if I was ever stalked myself. I’m very easy to find as I have also tried stalking myself to see what will appear to my potential stalkers. I am an open book and this blog is the biggest proof that I share way too much on social media and the internet. 

Ok I am not like a psycho who stalks everyone 🤣 just a few who I am curious about and the ones my friends are curious about.. 

This is basically a confession post.. I’m harmless 🤣

Please don’t block me🤣

P.S there is another Dina al Natour out there who isn’t very friendly and blocked me long time ago when I tried to befriend her 🤣

Always the Villain in Someone’s Story

There is a saying that you are always a villain in someone’s story. That is something I learnt the hard way that no matter what you do or how hard you try there is always be someone or many someone’s that see you as the villain. For the longest time I kept trying to understand the logic of their convictions and find myself questioning myself and doubting my identity. 

You see when you love or value people their perception of you is something you really are affected by. You try so hard to change their view of you. Eventually you realize that sometimes no matter how hard you try and no matter what you do, you will always be the villain in their story . The most important keyword here is “THEIR” story, not YOURS. 

You can’t control what they have narrated in their story about you but you can choose to make peace with the fact that this is part of life and they have the right to believe whatever they want about you. The most important thing is not to read their book of fiction and believe it to be facts.

Their idea of me does not define my worth or my true character it is merely a reflection of their own insecurities or doubts or misinterpretations and I will no longer live my life trying to repaint a beautiful colourful picture in their mind because it seems some people just are wearing shades and are incapable of seeing any colour

I will end this post by one big sharshabeel laugh

MUhahhahahsHaHaHa * echoes in dark woods 

Excess baggage

 

So after a long eye opening talk with my bestie it came to my attention that no matter how okay i convince myself i am they in reality all the baggage I carry around from many years still has a strong effect on me. Mentally emotionally and physically. 

You know how when you are packing to travel and you keep adding small items to your bag thinking the bag will fit then suddenly you are sitting on your bag trying to close the zipper and even if you managed to miraculously close it as soon as you reach the airport your bag breaks open and you have a big mess to deal with. It’s the same with our life issues we think oh it’s okay it’s not a big deal let me just shove it along in my emotional baggage backpack till one day something triggers you and you realize maybe you shouldn’t have packed this much along the way! 

I know it’s easier said than done but at least I will try to let go of some of that unecessary excess baggage that will only bring me down as even if it doesn’t show this baggage might eventually cause so much avoidable health issues. 

Wa bas hayk 😅yala pie pie 

Mending Hearts

 So here I am in attempt to vent and express myself so that I don't keep holding all my feelings inside and end up with more health issues.. So apparently the more you emotionally suppress your feelings the more like you you will end up with an Autoimmune disease ( like Dina Dandoon). So I am someone who has had my share of traumas and slaps in life and I choose to dust myself off and get up again every time and as usual I use comedy to deal with my tragedy. I thought this technique was working up until I was diagnosed with Chron's an Autoimmune disease that pretty much makes you live in the toilet.. & other issues inshala khier

* dina installs mini kitchen and tv in toilet 

I usually pretend I'm ok till I believe it.. بكذب الكذبة و بصدقها ( I lie the lie to myself then believe it)

I really do seem fine for a while then some trigger comes along unexpectedly and I'm standing there in the cafe ordering my coffee and I see an old man dressed like my dad same size karoosh same white hair same glasses and find myself crying say il habla saying " one ice latte www ww I th * baraabeer betsharsher 

* lady at counter gives Dina look.. Malha hay il majnooneh ( what's wrong with this crazy lady)

So yes I believe it is time to admit that maybe my strategy of LA MALEESH ishi ( nothing is wrong with ) isn't working.

I also always look at others people's stories and there is always someone whose story is worse than you a million times that would pray to be in your shoes.. So I believe I have reached the point of TOXIC positivity where I always find a way to see things in a positive way to save my sanity.. but maybe its ok to allow yourself to feel even if others have it much worse. Their pain doesn't invalidate yours. 

People in Palestine and Lebanon are witness a Genocide. The amount of horrific things we see makes us feel guilty for even breathing and going on with our daily life without being able to do anything. Nothing in our life compares to the hell they are in and I know that as a fact. 

BUT.. a feeling is a feeling and pain is pain.. knowing you are not experiencing a pain as deep and as strong doesn’t make your pain less real. 

One thing I know works for sure is that even if I’m unable to mend my own heart knowing that I can help mend anyone else’s heart by doing what I can makes me heal. 

I read something that I loved . Even a broken crayon can still color.. no matter how broken you feel and no matter what you have been through I believe we all still have the ability to mend others and when you help others Allah will help you and reward you in unexpected way that you can never even imagine. 

Whenever you give and do good it heals your heart because every good deed no matter how small is rewarded greatly.

Forgiveness is a Virtue Not and Obligation

 All my life I have been told to forgive and forget because forgiving is something you do for yourself to let go of the persons power over you. Forgiveness is something that you do for a bigger reward from Allah who will reward you for your forgiveness because the act of forgiving is such a hard task that will surely be rewarded greatly

 I have come to realize that the pain of attempting to forgive those who never even asked me for forgiveness who never ever acknowledged the horrible things they have done, the pain is far worse than actually deciding NOT to forgive. Forgiving them means I am letting my own self down, it means I have pardoned them infront of Allah for any harm they have done and for how they have wronged me.

There are many things that are forgivable but some are so horrible and incomprehensible to the human mind that I believe forgiveness is not an option.

I do not pardon them. I do not forgive the unforgivable things that have happened and I hope those people get what they deserve if not in dunya in al akhira

See you in judgment day.

Mostly in cases where there is " ظلم" and irreversible damage. 

Too Old for this

As we grow older our tolerance levels are less and less. You start to value your time more and you realize that you really don’t need to waste it on those who don’t appreciate you or put you down. You start to be incapable of “Mujamalat” and unnecessary small talk with people who are just simply toxic for you.

You realize you don’t to justify yourself to anyone and those who really matter usually don’t ask for justifications nor do they leave you feeling guilty for not seeing them as often or calling them. We all have our lives and problems and always know it’s not about the amount of times you see a person a week or the amount of msgs or calls you make. Life will show you who truly cares about you and who doesn’t.

I recently have lost the ability to tolerate a lot of things. Mujamalat. Meaningless gatherings of people falsely pretending they care about you. Maybe it’s the fact that I am over 40! 

I cherish my time and i no longer want to waste it in meaningless conversations or with people who surely won’t remain in my life.. 

she’s still your mother..

All my life i have been told you will never understand till you are a mother. You will never appreciate till you are a mother. Motherhood is much harder than i thought but even after being a mother it made things more clear to me.  Im sick of parents making their chidren feel guilty for being born blaming them for every problem in thier life. They decided to have a baby and bring their kids into this world and these children are born because you choose to bring them here. 

They are not your possession and they are not your slaves. Making them feel guilty for your every single mishap or inconvenience they might have caused by their mere existence is so wrong.

You want your kids to treat you with love and visit you when you are older you should make them feel safe and loved in their childhood. If you are old and your children can’t stand to be around you it’s maybe because you never loved them and pushed them away. 

Motherhood is a blessing even with all the hardship and sacrifices every mother makes the true reward is seeing them happy and knowing that you did your best to make them live with the least amount of psychological problems possible. 

What really really makes me angry is mothers using their mother “title” to abuse their kids. That no matter what your mother does to you no matter how horrible there is always someone who will say “ بتضلها امك" "she’s still your mother”. It took me years to finally understand that being a mother is not just a word or title. A mother is someone who loves her children unconditionally and doesn’t hurt them and make thier  lives a living hell. 

If you grew up with a narcissist mother that always hurts you and plays the mother card and pretends to be the victim I will never tell you “ she still your mother” 

بر الوالدين definition is different when you have a mother who lives to ruin your life and make it a living hell. If you tried everything and you still fail to stop the hurt it’s okay to keep your space and البر is actually الصبر على الأذى and not to return it to her. Pray for her from far away and know Allah knows you are only protecting yourself from being hurt by her again. 

I know many people mean well when they say advice such as “ no matter what she’s your mom” but truth is no one lived your story and no one knows the depth of your pain and no will even believe that a mother is capable of doing the things that were done to you. So it’s better to not give such advice when truely no one knows your story.