Its okay to happy.. its okay to be sad..

 

I don't know if its just me.. but recently i have been been feeling so many mixed feelings that im starting to think that i am schizophrenic. I can't say i'm fully to blame for this situation. We live in a world where people tend to tell you how you are "supposed to feel" by giving you comments or "talteesh 7aki" whenever you express any sort of emotion.

i'm the type of person who says whats on her mind.. i have a habit of sharing too much sometimes.. but i express how i feel whether its happy or sad. I say whats on my mind and this post is just me speaking out my mind..

I still remember before my wedding day.. how one of my Aunts came to me and said 

" How could you even think of wearing a white dress when your dad is sick?"

For those who don't know. about 6 years ago right after my engagement my dad had a stroke and had  severe brain damage  that left him fully paralyzed and incapable of speaking or moving. It was the hardest and saddest moment of my life. Allah yishfee 

The pain i felt and still feel is something even words cant express.  6 months after his stroke drs sent him back home with nurses as his condition was stable.. and after i asked the Drs. they said this is pretty much as good as it gets with this much brain damage.

After i heard what the Dr said we felt delaying the wedding waiting for a miracle recovery that may likely never come was not reasonable, especially that we were already legally married. We had a small wedding. no music. just zaffe and dinner. 

And i'm pretty sure if he could speak he would have been the first to tell me to go on with the wedding.

Many of my family and friends who i knew could have been there for me in such a heartbreaking time never showed up because they could not bare to watch me get married without my father being there.. as if their sadness was deeper or more sincere than mine... 

My dads condition is the same as it was 6 years ago now. Allah yeshfee. 

Getting married is every girls dream, you wait all your life to wear a white dress, to marry the person you love. If you want to judge me for wanting to have a wedding and wear a white dress, then be it.

 People need to know that in the world there is happiness and sadness, & they don't cross out each other. You can be happy about something and sad about something else simultaneously & no one has the right to judge you about what you feel or when you feel it. 

 

 I love to laugh and make jokes even when im depressed. Its my distraction. I love to make people laugh especially those who i know have gone through something very heartbreaking, like losing someone close to them. Because laughter is good for you. You can check this link and im sure many others that tell you the benefits of laughter. Im not saying laugh all day but its okay to smile and laugh even if there is a heavy sadness weighing down your heart.

So yesterday i posted a status about loving the snow and being happy about it snowing in Amman. I mentioned how i can't wait to make a snowman. This is a natural feeling for someone who never gets to see snow who lives in an OVEN in Dubai. Many made me feel so guilty for expressing that happiness because there are many less fortunate people in the world who dont have the luxury of heaters or homes.  I felt ashamed for even expressing such happiness. HOW dare i want it to keep snowing when there are people freezing.

But now im going to say it and im not ashamed for loving it. I LOVE SNOW. i love making a snow man. I wish i can slide down a snow hill with on a flat tire! i wish it snowed more often in Dubai! That doesnt mean my heart doesnt break for those who are suffering because of the cold weather. Rain and Snow are an Act of GOD. Allah Subahanoh and i pray for those who are less fortunate and will help if i could but my sadness for them doesn't cross out my happiness or excitement to see snow.

That doesnt make me heartless. It makes me Human. 

People please stop judging each other. Please let each other be happy or sad. 

Seeebo il naas fe 7aalhaa ( leave people alone)

You never know whats in the heart of the person infront of you and believe it or not in most cases what seems obvious to you is far from the truth.

Just know that you can feel extreme happiness and extreme sadness at the same time without any one of them being insincere.

 

 

EID FUN!

Hello dear readers.. as i promised and as i do every year i will share some pics from our eid event of the year hopefully it will inspire people from all around the world to do something different in the coming EID. to make it special :) We always throw birthday parties for our kids.. why dont we make EID parties also a MUST.. something our kids look forward to and remember all year long :)

Hope you enjoyed the pics.. im still waiting on more pics from the party.. but i think these will do :)
There was lots of fun and lots of love. and the joy of being able to take part in such a lovely event that brought so many people and family together was overwhelming.

I was inspired to do something with my ideas and i'm happy to tell you that i have teamed up with my friend who is great in making cupcakes ( as you see from the pics) and i will assist ofcourse and with my custom designs and party themes you can now order your themed cupcake toppers along with your yummy cupcakes. i also helped in making the sheeps and have a lot of recipes of my own  :)

Please check out more pics on our page on FB..  like it if you like it :) its called it Little Munch 
 

Wish you all had wonderful eid and eid break.. will be sharing more ideas and thoughts and blogs soon..

 kol 3am wa into bkhier... &wish us luck

 

EID IDEAS :)

Hello my lovely readers! Eid Mubarak wa kol saneh wa into salmeen! Every year we have to think of new ways to make EID FUN for our kids and for us as well. So let me share some ideas of how things to do.

This party we are throwing a EID party like every year with lots of fun for kids. Facepainting, baloon twister, entertainment, coloring on huge EID letters made out of foam and photobooth. I cant share pics yet because party is still in a few days.

But what i can share is ideas to decorate your homemade or bought cupcakes for EID. you can always make your own sheep marshmallow cupcakes :)

 

Sometimes it doesnt have to be fancy.. you can cut our little sheep from paper. Sheep are so easy to make. the one i made in the pic is made out of Cotton Buds and glue :) 

EID MUBARAK! 

wa Sam7oona

Bla Bla Bla Blue

Im just blabbing along.. too awake to go to sleep because of my constant thoughts and worries. Too lazy to get up and do something useful.. So i thought id blog a little since i haven't done that in a while..

The world is such a scary place.. i admit i'm not really the type of person that watches the news.. or know much about politics.. History was not my favorite topic.. neither was Math.. or Economics. ermmm my favorite class was the class the teacher is absent and we get a substitute teacher and we just sit and get all giggly in the back of the class talking about silly things that at that age seemed sooooo sooo SERIOUS! Like OMG did you notice she shaved her legs! MY MOM WOULD KILL ME!!!! * GASP * girl raises skirt a little to expose her leg that looks a little a GHORILLA!

 * Terrified SCREAMS in my head... ok i love to exaggerate... but seriously what do you expect .. 15 &ARAB.. and im pretty sure the chicken we eat has some major hormones injected in them... and everything we eat has been processed with something nasty.

ANY HOOOO... i tend to forget my main topic... somehow i ended up talking about Gorilla legs..

AT that age the biggest problems were money to buy the man2ooshe and chips in break time.. passing the MATH exam! Growing up so you can make your own decisions... not turn into a GORILLA!

Suddenly im 31... with two kids who I AM supposed to be making decisions for my children. Its so scary when i wasn't even sure i was making the right decisions for myself most of the time. I realize they catch on very quickly and without realizing i have created mini- ME's.. I feel it also has a lot to do with genetics but still.. DO i want my children to turn into ME? Do i want them to have my FEARS? My Worries? Of course not.. i want them to be better.. i dont want her to grow up with the insecurities i had..  and that is why im trying to be better... but still no matter what i do the world is a scary place... i dont want to do any huge mistakes where one day ill wake up and think to myself WHERE DID I GO WRONG??

There is so much Politics, and HATE everywhere you turn... Innocent lives go unnoticed.. Greed... I feel no one even know thier own religion... People Committing crimes in the name of their religion or faith when they have learnt it all wrong.. Being Modest is not considered weird or oppressed.. Wearing slutty clothes that leave no room for imagination has become the NORM..

Forgive me if i dont know much about the exact political situations around the world... but i know enough to know that the world we live in is messed up. We are all desynthesized by all the death we see on tv. Seeing a group of dead kids lying on the floor has become something we are used to.

I dont need to know politics to know that the world is full of greed and selfishness . Family killing each other and on the never ending quest for an extra dollar or dirham. Violent Protests all around the Arab world over thier lifetime presidents that have seemed to gathered so much wealth throughout the years when their country is left with so much poverty.

We as humans have lost our humanity. Hate and Greed has consumed us. We all seek our own well being not knowing that when we don't unite and fight against each other we will never be WELL.
We have lost our compassion for each other, with an inability to compromise.  I believe its in our nature to be SELF-DESTRUCTIVE. We think of all the reasons to HATE one another when there are FAR many better reasons to LOVE each other. Isnt it enough that we are the same SPECIES ???

When will we rise above our nature, when will we listen to the voice inside us that tells us to do what is RIGHT, what is best for HUMANITY..

The way things are going i predict that with all the chemical bombs and in the wrong hands, this selfishness and greed will bring down the world and our human species will be exitinct.

And one day in the future a group of monkeys or new species will rule the world and hopefully they will do a better job than we did.


Everywhere i look there is NAKAD .. whats NAKAD in english.. you might thing it means NAKED but no it means Gloominess.. and well everywhere you look there is also NAKED people.. i dont know what it is.. but it seems that is fashionable now to walk around either with shorts with pockets longer than the short itself or with only a shirt and forgetting to wear pants.

So long story short... 

Dear All.. Make Love Not War

There are things more important getting your hair done BelSeshWar

If someone says something that makes you SHRUG

Instead of beating them up give them a HUG

IF someone doesnt agree with you

The right way is not by throwing a SHOE,

but maturely discuss the Issue,

Then make up and cry and make sure there is a box of Tissue

Its not about being RIGHT

its not about winning the FIGHT

IT's Not about WHO is STRONGER

We just ALL wish to live LONGER!

translation ( Bel Seshwar : BLowdryer)

P.S.
 Do not.. i REPEAT.. DO NOT.. Google " hairy woman" Its.. nasty and disturbing on so many levels
*pukes shalaaallll

P.S.

Imagination is a lovely thing.. ladies in the world who choose to not leave any room for imagination for anyone with the clothes or lack of clothes they wear.. i suggest you add a little mystery into your life.. or a bantalown.. wa SHukrann..

( "war" typography artwork by Levi Dubbelman from deviant art)

RAMADAN KAREEM wala RAMA-DISC 2aLEEM

Let me start by wishing you all a blessed holy month of Ramadan full of blessings, family & friends reunions, lots of giving and spirituality. Kol Saneh wa Into Salmeen! 

It is a blessing itself to witness this month again. Unfortunately throughout the years everyday Ramdan feels different because we are different every year. Different could be better or worse or just plain different. 

When we are so far away and caught up in life and 3azayem and musalsalat and whatever.. we suddenly feel that we are no longer in that place where listening to the sheikhs prayers made your eyes tear. Your heart is heavy.. with thunoob.. with life.. with humoom and suddenly you find yourself lazy to get up for taraweeh.. your prayers are done in a hurry.. you dont even remember what ayat you prayed with... and we dont realize that slowly we are going further and further away from God. Losing our Faith.. our IMAN.. and that is the biggest Museeba.. What worse is that we dont even realize it and tell ourselves we are okay.. Telling ourselves we are okay and being satisified with the way we are is what the Shaytan wants and in the end its our loss...

Allah yihdeeni.... wa yihdeena jamee3an.. we need to work hard to clean our hearts in this holy month.. We dont realize how weak we really are till we get sick. We dont realize how Life can be lost in a blink  of an eye till we lose somoeone close. If there is anytime for Al Tawba it is now.. Allah ysa3dna 3ala taa3toh...

So.. guess meen sarlo DISC!???? *raises HAND!.. there was a time when i heard the word DISC im LIKE HOW?? DISC? isnt that just for OLD PPL?! ya3ni maraaarti ( my gallbladder) ma sarlhash kteer  Faaag3a! i just had that removed a few months back! And now DISC?!

Al Hamdulilah 3la kol 7all. Al Hamdullila dayman 

so i just recently joined the gym.. was so excited about it! *dino works out excessively zay il majaneen

one week later.. i bend down to carry lina.. and AYYYYYY

Thahreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Dr in emergency insisted its a " MUscular SPASMS" with an indian head shake that meant " ur being silly noting is wrong with you..

A week later i got an MRI and well i have a disc in my BACK.. and surprisingly its VERY COMMON! kol ma a7ki la 7ad they either say ME TOO or know 30 other ppl that have it! 

Discs were not common ZAMAN! Our parents generation only Old ppl got DISCS. Its our lifestyle. we dont move. we eat zabayel. and well oh i also have very LOW VIT D 

normal levels are 20-60 or 30-60.. my level is 6.. Ironic since we live in an OVEN.. 

If you are living in DUBAI.. ur probably always hiding from the SUN like me.. GET UR VIT D levels Checked...

So Anyhow.. That is my nashra Akhbareya.. i really hope no one gets DISCS. unless if they are movies or music cds :P 

Sheeshany makes fun of dina walking like a hajjeh* dino bends to pick up  shib shib AYYY

* he runs

kolo kam yom * nazret ta7aluf with chicken tikka hand move.. 

chicken tikka.. * dreams.. Yumm *drools on keyboard

YA bayee shu ba7ki.. bas ballah ma Damee Khafeeef?! 

zay wazni bel zabt.. TAn ra ra ran TAN TAN Tshhh

So This Ramadan i wanted to do something different that lulu is older. Although she doesnt get the concept of fasting.. or Ramadan.. and she thinks Ramadan is a place we go to.. and she calls it 

MARADAN.. everyday after futoor she packs her bag and says " YALA nroo7 3ala MARADAN 3an TATA" cause we told her in Ramadan we are going to visit her Grandma & Grandpa

Still.. i wanted her to feel there is something special about this month.. to wait for it.. to love it.. growing up i feel we didnt really get attached to Ramadan or EID. We know something was going on but we didnt really think it was fun..

So here are some ideas to do in the house especially if you have kids :

Decorate with lights or even make your own paper lanterns and decorations.

I did these choco laterns myself :) from screatch!

filled with choco dates! :)

Fill little bags of chocolates and give them out to your neighbors with your kids

Make a Chart the counts the Ramadan Days and the days left for EID So your Kids know EID is something Special and add anticipation to EID..

just Decorate with any material you have around :)

That is just a few.. im sure you can think of many more! :) Lets all share the Ramadan Spirit and Spread the LOVE! :) 

RAMADAN MUBARAK 3alikom INSHALA WA Sam7oona..

American WaLAAAkin

I havent had time to illustrate my own cartoons got this off the net but added my text :p but i will soon inshala :) but have lots to blog about.. 

ok.. so did you ever meet one of those ppl who lived all thier life abroad and speak english " bet3ajo" ino ERR ERR American or Bri2ish.. and suddenly they speak arabic and say something like

"Bakaayna Ka3dat fel 7adeeqa it go2 really freakin cold fa rakathna 3al DAAAR"??

welll true story.. wa fe minhin TCHTHEER TCHWAam Tchwaam

il english Yo Yo wil 3arabi HATH HO

and i have to admit its hilarious... and shocking to see the transformation. but it made me think...

*someone yells.." yee 3alaina wa 3al falsafeh again

So.. why is it that we feel so strongly that the AMErican Accent is the "Prestige" accent.

Why isnt the Fala7i accent seen as vulgar, and some would look down on someone who speaks with such strong Falaaa7i accent and degrade them like they are beneath them because they dont speak

Sheeka Beeka

ya3ni we would be sitting in a group.. and a girl whose english is no so great would pronounce a word wrong like .. the P. B. or PRAD BITT. or pronounce a silent letter like 

WAitor can i have the SHEEEKIN FAJJJJJITA

i think i would crack up.. walek FAHeeeta Faheeta ya habla.. hathi il JJJ SILENT.. zay il MObile fil cinema lazim ykoon SILENT .. 

* ja7ra as she reminds her of the time her phone rang mohamad muneer 3alee soootak lil Ghunnaaaa in the middle of the movie 

So... what im saying did you ever see a group of AMericans or Brits siting in a room talking in ARABIC and then the American was reading an ARabic WORd and pronounces incorrectly and his American friend laughs at him ???

NO LIESH??? li2ano i7na il 3arab ... we forgot that the Quran is in ARabic.. this is the Language God Chose to address us in.. which means its the best language in the world.. whether its Fala7i or just Arabic we should be proud of ourselves and not make others whose english is not so great feel bad..

i personally feel bad that my english is stronger than my Arabic

*someone says " IKHS"

*looks around.. and yes its something im not proud of.. wa nifsi akoon shatooora fil i3raab wil Spelling wil qawa3ed qabl ma aseer min il qawa3ed min il nessaaa2

my dad is from tulcharem. and when he used to speak to us bel qaaf. "Quleeli wa Qultelek" and we used to laugh and make jokes.. and now i think about it.. il fala7i accent could sound funny to us but its how they were brought up and does not make them any less intelligent or classy that the ppl who say " 2aal wa 2ulna"

old lady says :

"LaweEish Burtunoo engleeezi hadol il NABi 3arabi"

but i confess.. i just love love the falahi accent and just the mix of fala7i ana amreeki will always make me laugh because its just so drastic :P

Deep Thoughts

Hokay... i must say fe nsaas hal layali im i find myself caught in very deep thoughts. so warning ra7 atfalsaf KTEEER..

I was thinking about a lot of things... i dont know how my thoughts went from oh this hot choco was sooo yummmy if only i could have enjoyed it more drinking it without my mouth and face being Numb.. i went to the Dentist today.. and well now when i smile i look like two ppl. one side smiles the other frowns.. freaky.. im sure there is a good side to this.. hmm if anyone slapped me now i wouldnt feel it..

*someone slaps dina min nifso .. ermmm WRONG side.

AYYYYY.. what was that for anyway?? *ja7ra..

sooo anyhooo.... back to my deep thoughts * wears thinking cap..

i was thinking about life.. and the cycle of life.. and how we all set our priorities in our lives thinking we are making the best choices.. What if our priorities were wrong? How will we ever know?

Let me give you an ex.. i thought of my dad.. he spent his whole life working.. he life was hard ever since he was a little boy.. My grandpa was 3ageed il 7ara apparently and well he had a tough life and when he was old enough he saved money for a ticket to Amreeka sheeka beeka.. and when he got there to pay for his tuition he had to clean dishes and work two jobs while he studied.

He built himself from scratch and when eventually he got married to my mazar wa khalafna ana wi ikhwati.. he provided us with the best education and life he could. Something he wanted to give us because he felt he never had. He spent his days and nights working. Traveling at times and even when he is around he was not around for so long that it was hard to really sit and talk with him.

The years went by so fast and we grew up and yes i love my dad and yes all he did was for us to give is the best life, but was it all worth it? Was he working extra hours because that is all he was used to doing or because he needed to? i felt he reached a point where he could no just sit down. he needed to work.. he needed to get up and work on something..

Sometimes we don't want gifts or money or fancy clothes.we want the person you love to be there when you need them the most.. now i think back of all the time i missed.. that he missed.. time is so precious... but we take it for granted.

Akeed this is not an inviation la kol rjaal yuk3udo fil daarr wa yel3abu ma3 wladhum. im just saying.. we just need balance..

We work and work to get money and when we have enough money we want more money to ensure our future and our kids future. And one day.. like my dad.. he wouldn't know what hit him when he suddenly had a stroke and was left fully paralyzed and unable to speak.. all his money in the bank frozen that even He cant spend it on himself in a time like this.. Al hamdulila money is not a problem but im just saying.. working is good and sometimes its not a choice but a Need.

We need to work to provide for our families.. we need to work to feel like we are making a difference in the world..

we cant get everything in life.. its just so hard knowing that whenever we make a choice we are missing out on another one.. i think we should all learn to balance our lives and priorities.so that we don't wake up one day and think to ourselves that we missed out on the best days of our lives because we chose to chase a dream not realizing that we were already living the dream.

we need to know that sometimes we miss out on what we already have because we are so worried about fulfilling a hope that we dont really need.

Allah yshfeek ya baba ya katkooti il kabeer..


next post shall be more cheerful.. i bromise


Disclaimer :

This post is not 6al6eesh 7aki to anyone.. and i am not referring to anything in specific.. this is just me thinking out loud.. i know someone taweel wa katkoot might think im referring to him but i really am just thinking about my experience here so dont over analyze this *throws fly kiss in the air * waves bat really hard

DUjjjjjjj * fly Dujj hayy kur kur kur ma aznakhni.. time to sleep

SuperMama SuperStress SuperMan *giggles

im sure alot will be thinking.. yeee 33alieena another Mommy Post... Bedha t7amelna jmeeele again ( (translation : she wants to carry a beauty on us  :p) that she is a mother.. like we used to feel when our moms gave us lectures about motherhood and reminded us of pregnancy and said

" bukra betshoofi bas yseer 3andek wlaad" and we would say.. yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee 3alieeenaaaaa


Life passes by so fast and when i get a moment of silence and actually have the ability and time to look back at my life.. like right now when kol 7ada nayem.. and im resisting the urge to sleep although i think i might fall asleep before i finish this post.. twitches

*ighmaa2 on keyboard

eihweihfifhtioghgfhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

* wakes up from MAC ding ding ding from keys being pressed by dinos nose

So as i was saying.. its not the physical part of motherhood that is the hardest part.. suddenly pregnancy and labor and all that pain seems like nothing compare to the emotional stress and vulnerability mothers can feel.

It starts when we are pregnant and start feeling bad for breaking the rules and not eating right all the time.. thats when the motherhood guilt starts.. the guilt comes with the worrying.. am i doing everything right. will the baby be okay.. how will i go home with this little nu2ta??

you start freaking out about how tiny the baby is... your body feels like it has been hit by a train but the love you feel is overwhelming.. you no longer live for yourself. you live for your baby.. and as days go by you start to get the hang of it.. you learn the best ways to close the diapers so that they are no leakage accidents.. you are brave enough to bathe your tiny baby without the help of your mother or mother in law.. you try to do everything by the book.. only you have no timeor patience  to actually read A book!

24 hours a day for the rest of your life you will be constantly worrying and thinking about your children.. in your eyes they will always be the baby you held in your arms that day after alf saneh of labor...

i used to think the hardest part was labor.. till after labor.. the i thought the hardest part was the sleepless nights... till my baby start sleeping through the night only she was walking now and i worried about her hurting herself all day long..and so on.. truth is it doesn't get easier... every age has its difficulties and challenges.. and i feel like a failure most of the time and i will ball my eyes out almost everyday because i always feel that i did something wrong...

i especially feel that when my law law is throwing a tantrum in the mall and ppl give me the " bta3rafeesh trabee look"

or when a mother stops you from giving her kid "Cheerios" ( which to me were a healthy snack) because they have sugar.. *GASPS * dina hides bags of chips and chocolates

i know i make mistakes.. and we all do.. but i have to stop beating myself about it and start looking at all the things i did right instead of all the things i have done wrong.

the most important thing is that i will do my best to be a super mama... i am not superman.. i mean superwoman..

speaking of superman... Salmooli 3alieh * giggles like a 13 yr old muraaheqa

Astagherulllaaah.. yala qooolo ma3ay  " Ya Rab ma teftin Dina fe Deeeenha" :P

Ameeeen...

 * someone throws shibshib at dino.. is that Sheeshany?? oh thanks thats one of my shabashib ive been looking for it

You know watching the movie superman made me realize that usually im sitting there watching a movie ma3 ba3li and all sorts of Gamameer come on screen wa lazim faj2a tma6er wa yghayroo malabess wa hakaza... its the first time there was not much ladies but focus on il wad il Super * evil laugh

and i want to say... GUYS how did you feel watching the movie next to your gamoorat?? did you feel like you wanted to punch him? did you feel like you dont want to be compared ?

Did you wish he was SUPERFAT like this ?

Did you feel your blood was boiling at the thought that the person you love would ever compare you to that? l well that is usually how us woman feel when you stare at ridiculously hot woman on tv!

Dino yells : Hathol il Setaaat Ma bikhalfooosh ( someone yells  ANGELLINAA has 20 walad)...ermmmm

ok ok .. dina ends argument before ma tkhabes haha


Shoofo.. i started talking about Motherhood.. and somehow ended talking about Superman.. and it seems any conversation or topic i have with anyone leads to this same topic

*sighs

on a serious note.. Allahum balighna Ramadan.. wa ihdeeena wa ij3al kol zawj fe 3ayn zawjto Superman wa a7la kaman  :)

Ana zowji tab3an bya3raf he is my superman mini zaman ba2olo hayk ( 7aqeeqah ) wa aydan tar2eee3

.. wa akeed ba3looolu  by3arf ino il soora hay il feeha ana wa superman is just il nas bet7awel twa2e3 bayna .. ma kaan fee bayna ishi.. bas kont bawka3 min il sutu7 wa ana banshur il ghaseelat wa lagafni suBarman..

innocent wag3a.. i bromise :p

Turkish Bath Horror

So i havent been bloggin much.. i would love to blog more.. i would love to do alot of things more.. but    well life as a parent of two very naughty girls is not easy and there isnt much time to spare. and when there is time i am too lazy to type... but there is always an exception... i have to blog when i experience BIG shocking experiences... 

* if you are under the age of 18.. look away from this post cause it might get ugly hahaha

husbandee took us to our first family trip to TURKEY! up until this day Turkey to me was only a sanweesha of turkey and cheese.. or a MUSALSAL turkey.. i must admit thanks to my mother in law i am hooked on 2 turkish series now.. and whenever i am RELIEVEd that its OVER! that i finally finished the 19892893898 episode.. i find out there is SEASON 2 3 4 * ya lahweee

soo any hoooo... we went to turkey.. with two kids.. two stroller.. 3 bags & lots of Jnaan.. My comments on Turkey is that its a beautiful country.. weather is lovely.. ppl are friendly.. and well it made me wish i concentrated in History class as there was so much History in ISTANBUL!

And if you think its only the turkish series that are 7abeebeh wa Laveeveh you havent seend Turkish ppl in real life.. Kolo fish 7asheesh be7eb il taani.. Couples everywhere holding hands, heads in each others laps fel 7asheesh*dino stares at ppl expressing thier love and feel she is in musalsal.
* ppl give her a look that she should stop staring

as i tweeted before i wish there was a DAblajeh button where i press it and everyone around me is suddenly speaking Syrian :S But anyway balad 7abeeeb... m7ajabat mush m7ajabat kolo love love love ..  zay muhanad wa noor wa hakaza

Dogs there seemed drugged though for some reason all the dogs there are always sleeping or about to sleep!

But i must ask the Turkish BEOBOLS.. Why why dont you speak a little bit of english.. ya3ni keef keef ballahi can i explain i want to buy" BAMBARZ" to wa7ad befhamsh english or arabic

* man stares at dina as she acts out the word KAKA.. :S ok ok i didnt but i was abt to!

So.. they hardly speak english or arabic other than the word " Tanzeelat Tanzeelat"

The Country is not Children friendly which is why i believe they LOVE kids because there arent much kids in the streets. I think ppl there dont bother leaving the house with thier kids because its just TOO HECTIC

* dino pushes stroller on rocky roads.. carries them up stairs with husbandii.. * kids head wobbling up i seriously was worried if there was any IRTIJAAAJ fil mukh! long days of sitting in a very bumpy stroller ride.. lulu was kind of cranky and did a huge tantrum in AYA SOFIA.. well when she grows up and studies it in school i will tell her.. MAMA we took you there and your screams echoed inside!

*dino tries to calm her down by pointing at the calligraphy.. Shoofi ya mama.. haada maktoob min alaaaafff il sineeen hahhhaha yeahhhhh that worked KTEeeer ( sarcasm)

After spending 3 days in IStanbul we went to ANTALYA... another plane ride only this time with a bus ride to the plane and my poor ba3li had to carry both strollers to the bus.. wasnt a long flight though and was worth it! Antalya is beautiful..

So now we get to the main event... *drums roll.. Jowzi al 3azeez saw how stressed i was and offered to let me get a turksih bath and massage in the hotel.. at that moment i thought.. YA SALAM.. relaxation. i envisioned candles and relaxing music .. skin shining with nathafeh...

So i go up to the Spa.. to a lady who ofcourse speaks no words of 3anglish..
I understood from her sign language that i should get ready.. i pointed out that sharafi ma besma7 that i wear only my birth suit.. and at that moment i thought she understood...

holding on to my towel like it was sharaf il 3eileh i walk with her to the turkish bath ghurfeh.. and once we walked i saw..... * twitches... agool wala ma agooollllll

OLD Naked Ladies... Fat Old Naked Ladies... sitting there like its OKAY.. Chatting along ... with things hanging and at that moment i wanted to run out.. but it was too late....

and the rest i cannot say.. all i can say is... it was not in my hands.. actually the towel WAS in my hands.. then it wasnt * cries hysterically and hugs knees...

hatha kowm wil  MASSAGE kowm... i forgot i cant really blog about this... its an experience i dont think ill Get over..

Sharaf il 3eileh..... daa3 daa3 hahhahaha

here is an additional video from Turkey... pls notice my tasweer il video clip.. ahaha

Following your Instincts..

Instincts.. when do you follow them.. when do you ignore them... i am a person that believes that we all have an internal radar.. its tell you when things are right.. its tells your when something is fishy.. i tend to ignore my instincts at times about some people.. because what i see from them contradicts what i feel.. i tell myself maybe i'm paranoid.. maybe im just being negative and doubtful of a sweet innocent person.. then.. something happens and i say.. I should have followed my instincts..

So when.. do we know its instincts and not just natural worries and doubts...

When do you follow your gut even if following your gut might seem irrational.. so what is intuition ?

Intuition is basically how you quickly tap into your subconscious mind, which is where you "archive" all kinds of information that you don't remember on a conscious level.Sometimes you pick up on things subconsciously without realizing it, such as body language. It'll register as a certain "feeling" that you can't articulate at that moment, but it could very well be valid.

You may fight your gut feeling.. and ignore it.. but eventually and sooner or later you will know that this feeling was there for a reason..

All this time i thought instincts was something on a psychic level.. i didnt know it was actually like a subconscious data base of collected information that we have gathered from previous experiences.

What if you meet someone and they seem nice and sweet but your gut tells you they are bad news do you back off and follow your gut feeling even though they still didnt really harm you or do you just give them the benefit of the doubt?

i guess this is one of my serious posts.. next post will hopfeully be a funny one :)

Im Back To Bogging :)

Hellooo! Essalamo 3aliekin! how r u my lovely readers.. So as you know now i am Marara-less.. Gallbladderless. i feel like i have had a C-section.. Hamdulilah much better now. I am pretty much back to my daily crazy schedule. IT was a tought experience and my emotions were on a rolelr coaster.

Time like this kind of made me realize i am surrounded by people who love me. Al hamdulilah. I am blessed with so many things i can't even begin to count my blessings. Al hamdulilah.. It made me set my priorities straight. See true colors of some people... But Al hamdulilah

My surgeries went well. the Dr was hilarious. He kept making jokes about me being inflated for both operations. Told my husband he can leave the hospital by tying a thread on my foot and i will float like a BALLOON.

The whole surgery experience was scary. I mean you are lying there in a different world with people cutting you and blowing CO2 inside your stomache and turning you around and ofcourse they SEE EVERYTHING! AAAAH!

I didnt know surgeons always played music in the operation room! as soon as they rolled in the bed i heard all the nurses and dr chatting in a chatty mood making jokes.. like there are about to sit in TCHE TCHE or something .. then i hear  " CHA CHA CHA rampa rampa" lambada like music!! and as i was thinking in my head to say; PLEASE QURAN balash amoooo..........

Zzzzzzzzzzzzz

WOke up to the sound of farts.. and i was thinking WHO IS FARTING?!?!?
OMG IS THAT MEE???
im not?? OH ITs not EVEN A FART! WHAT IS THAT??!?!?!

I was DEFLATING.. and it was a very long awkward ride to my WARD ... the philipino guy pushing the bed was enjoying my lovely TUNES hahahahah

HOW EMBARASSING!!

Then i was like oh the surgery was in my stomache so glad no one saw my Bumm with the sad excuse for disposable underwear they give you in the hospital... only later do i find a sticker... in a place i thought was Unseen.. * cries..

ya fde7tchi il ba2et be galagel..

Its that awkard moment after surgery when your Dr comes in to check on you.. and you think.. should i wear my hijab... hahaha i did wear it but i think the Dr found that funny :S

So.. nwo everyone says... "MEEEN Faga3alik MARARTEK!!?!?

(who exploded your Gallbladder)

i keep saying jowzi akeed... bas huzbandee miskeeen.. hahaha

Im back and Bloated.. and Thank you all for your support and prayers.. I really would not have done it without your kind words..

Allah yes3edkom!

Kidney Stones? Gallstones? Weish Gaal?

So... I have been having upper abdominal pains.. The first time was about a year ago.. First time it happened i was pregnant with lonlon.. at that time i told my Dr she said pregnancy causes all sorts of weird things to happen. that i should expect anything from nose bleeds, abdominal pain, numbness, GAS, back pain, hemorrhoids & the list goes on.. sorry this was too much detail.. 

So anyway ofcourse as usual i ignored the pain.. cause im not important i have no time i always delayed taking an appointment. Recently the pain has gotten worse and it was no longer a pain i could ignore. It was no longer just once a month or every two month but at least once a week. 

I had an appointment with the Dr. a few days and he did an endoscopy. Before he was telling the procedure i interuppted him saying " oh i did this before".. He asked really?? i sasid yes i once swallowed a PIN..

*dr holds in laugh

*awkward silence

So anyway... after that he said i had no ulcers and that i probably had REFLUX. its kids of like heart burn but worse.. So well i thought maybe thats all i had.. joojle it

They called me yesterday with the ultrasound results saying that i have not one but SEVERAL kidney stones and GALLSTONES. At this point im like " HUH?? wisho HATHA? i have no ideas what those are what causes them. All i know is that growing up i heard my grandmother and uncles and aunts had them which is why i thought it only happens to the much older generation. i remember always asking my mom  " shu il 7asweh??? " i remember she answered me but i never really Understood it :S ino 7ajjar?? jowa il batn??

So im sure many of you like me are clueless about this so here are some links to know more about what these stones are and what causes them.. so you know the symptoms before its worse and you need a surgical procedure like me.. there could be several causes and im still waiting for blood test results to know what caused mine.. Maybe being half from GAZA.. dont they call us ATFAL al HIJARA! (children of rocks) .. i just didnt expect to have rocks inside me :S 

http://www.ehow.com/about_5369269_symptoms-gallstones-kidney-stones.html

Suddenly all the things that i was thinking about before the Drs call seem insignificant. Fights with friends over stupid things seem pathetic. All i think of is that in one minute God can turn your life around. One minute your okay the next you are getting prepped for surgery.

Al Hamdulilah for everything. It also got me thinking. All this time i have put my kids first, my family always comes first. my friends, my responsiblities. I have had a tooth ache for more than 1 year now as well that i keep delaying getting done! I then remembered that on an airplane, they tell you attend to yourself first then help your children. And that is done for a reason. Not because your life is more important, but because if you dont attend to yourself and you die, you will be unable to save your kids. So putting yourself first sometimes is not only Okay, but the right thing to do. 

Inshala if the operation goes well i will change my life style, start taking care of my health. Eat Right. Not ignore any more pains thinking im JUNGAR. because i plan on being there inshala for my kids. I plan on being well inshala so i can make sure they are cared for.