i feel a heaviness in my throat again... its like a lump that i feel when i think of my life... thoughts and questions invade my mind... steal away the sleep from my eyes...i need to just let it out of my system b4 it eats me up alive...

could a person be in love with love itself? the feeling of love and being in love?! rather than a person ? i dunno sometimes i feel im in love with love itself and the idea of being intoxicated with love! maybe i watch too many movies...they say all is fair in love and war... and love makes the world go round( wait that was MONEY)hehe

ne way.. im a sappy romantic dreamer that is in love with love... they say all love fades and what u see in movies is far from the sad reality... the reality of men sittin there infront of the tv burping as they watch the game in their stained shirt! while the lady cooks in the kitchen hair curled up in little hair rolls, smellin like fish and onions! that's the image that comes to mind when i think of the "AFTER LOVE ENDS" eheh i mean come on... if a lady loooks and smells like that id rather watch the GAME too!

no wonder i fear commitement and marraige! i dont want to end up like the normal couple that eventually end up giving each other attitude and sayin things like " u ruined my life"!do all married couples meet the same fate ?! is it a cycle that we all have to go through?!

enough for today... back with more psychological problems later :P